She

Dear Hayden,

My shaky hand used the pen to scribble words down onto the lonely white sheet of paper.

You've asked me to not contact you again. You've walked out like our years together were nothing. I've been imagining my life without you and I simply cannot.

A tear so effortlessly fell from my stained cheek and as I continued to wrote out the heartbreaking, truthful words I began to realize that this was happening.

I know it doesn't matter now. You've found him and you're happy. And I'm ever so grateful for him, that he can take care of you the way I know I should've. But nothing hurts worse knowing you're happy with somebody else.

And it's true. During my period of having her in my life I was so high on the euphoria she brought me that I spaced out on loving her the way I needed to. She was my world, my entire life and I so carelessly didn't express that enough to her.

Damn it Hayden I'm begging you please. Please don't end it like this. We've been through to much. You know it! You know I love you. & you know that I can't just walk out of your life like this. And I know you can't walk out of mine.

It's a cocky thing of me to say, but I was praying that it would be true. That, that statement would somehow make her realize that she couldn't live without me.

Hayden, love, you know that I can't be without you.

I can't.

This is breaking me. It hasn't even been a week yet and I'm loosing my faith in everything. I need you. I have no reason to live my life without you.

You're my every thought. My every comparison to everything else. You're my heart beat, the person that can make my day go from hell to heaven. I love you more than the stupid words meaning.

I love you more than anything and I mean anything. I'd do absolutely anything for your forgiveness! If that's even a possibility.

Please Hayden I need you.

I left that note in our apartment. I left fifteen minutes before her arrival to pack her things. She last requested that I not be there when she arrived.

I couldn't bear to make her any more angry with me...

An hour after I left the apartment I once shared with my favorite person ever I received a text.

Wifey: I'm sorry Del.. I cannot speak with you anymore. Good luck with everything. I'm sorry. Xx

Fucking hell. Is the the only thing I could think as I saw red and pressed as hard as I could on my gas pedal.