ILWMH [DISCONTINUED]

Missing You

You know it's fucked up to hurt someone you love because it hurts you too. Everybody deserves a second chance but, my second chance already passed.

It kinda hurts me that I woke up alone in my bed. This whole situation made me realize, I fucked up, bad.

Maybe, I don't need anymore chances, I keep thinking. I sighed getting up to make some money. I slipped on a pair of blue jeans, black and white Nikes, and slipped on a black varsity jacket on top of my white T-Shirt.

Heh, tell me how you would feel in my shoes. 

I rode to Eric's house, hoping to take Shay off my mind.

I pounded on the door about five times before Shanya opened the door.

"E!! Your boy's here," she said lazily before slamming the door in my face.

I sighed before stepping into his one of his many houses.

"Man, why the fuck did you slam the door in my face?! Your tripping Shanya!," I yelled at her.

"Is that all y'all do? Sit around and smoke to your own music?," she asked Eric.

"And fuck bitches," Dre added. She rolled her eyes as she sung along to Findum, Fuckem, and Flee.

"If that nigga starts fucking up, I'll just fuck his friend," she sung switching the words around.

"Shanya, I'm 'bout to slap the shit out your ass!," I yelled.

"Whoa! Let's calm down here. Can y'all just kiss and make up?," Yella pleaded.

"Fuck you," she stated. I observed her body language. She seems emotional. Her eyes were watering and I saw her biting her lip, holding back tears.

"Look Shanya, I want to talk," I started.

"We have NOTHING to talk about," she interrupted with her fist clenched.

I got up and pulled ger stubborn ass up off the couch. I took her into the bathroom.

"What," she said with an attitude.

"I missed you, babygirl. I know I fucked up you might not want to be with me but, I need you to forgive me," I explained.

She put her head down in defeat.

"I already forgave you but I don't need your pity. Look, right now I just want us to be friends," she said walking out the door.

My heart dropped all the way to the floor. I had never thought in a million years that Shanya could just be friends after all that happened.

Hours later, I found myself on my bed damn near depressed.
What has this girl turn me into?, I thought.

"What the fuck am I gonna do with all these boxes?," I asked myself.

I miss him. I do, but I don't have time to be in second place with some dick sucking rapper bitch. Why is love so damn complicated.

I'm sweating, my weight has been going up. Also, I might have a stomach virus. Whew, I hope I didn't get what I asked for.

Ugh! Why the fuck is it so hot, though? I'm about to snatch this weave out my head and go back to my old ways.

I picked up a shoe box that had photos in it. I read the date, September 5, 1985. I turned it around to see Lorenzo and I hugging when we were younger.

Tears flooded my eyes as I started blushing. "Shit!," I yelled as I ran to the bathroom. The clean toilet water got filled with my lunch.

"Ugh," I groaned brushing my teeth.

I grabbed my keys walking out the door to the corner store. The suburbs was so much different from Compton. But, I had to move back because the rent will blow your head off over there.

I got to the store searching for the healthcare aisle. "Wassup, Shanya," Lorraine greeted popping up out of no where.

"Hey..uhm..girl. What y-you doing here?," I nervously asked.

"What else would you come to the store to do?," she laughed.

"Right," I said shifting away from her.

"Girl, you gotta lay off them 40 oz. and that FatBurger," she suggested poking at my small pudge.

I rolled my eyes walking away and snatching three different kinds of pregnancy tests.

I tossed it on the counter, while handing him my money..........

             ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
I pissed on all of them, waiting on the shocking results.

"If you have my baby, what do you want to name it?," he asked me while cuddling up in the bed.

"La'Nya if it's a girl and Ali if it's a boy," I suggested.

"Why all this talk about kids anyway. Nothing is messing up this figure," I sternly told him.

"Haha, we'll see about that," he said pulling me on top of him.

"Lorenzo! Stop," I giggled.

"I love you," he told me.

"What??"

"I love you," he said louder.

"Huh??"

He tickled me making me pee on myself.

"Lorenzo!!!"

The alarm on my kitchen timer and it was time to see the truth.

I looked down at all three if them. All of said the same thing.

Pregnant.