This first person account of a prostitute depicts and unravels the onerous journey of a harlot from becoming a devdasi to reforming into a survivor, conquering the tribulation in her life in a daunting manner. This narrative portrays the life of a h...
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' Jai Devi Jai Devi Yellama Ovadu...
Jai Devi Jai Devi Yellama Ovadu...'
I was sitting in the most famous Yellamma temple is near the village of Soundatti, in the state of Karnataka, with villagers beside me and the priest was chanting mantras. I was adorned in a green saree, green blouse and green bangles. My long hair was braided with sweet smelling jasmine flowers. I was given a lovely necklace and told that i was marrying the goddess Yellamma. I was being dedicated as a Devdasi.
I remember being very exuberant about the dedication ceremony as I wore shiny clothes and was the centre of attraction on my special day. I was delighted but could not understand why my mother was tied up with a banyan tree nearby and she kept crying. I was unable to comprehend the pretext of her behaviour when all others smiled and rejoiced.
I felt special and important. I was made to sit on a white blanket and the priest put rice around my white throne, sitting on which I was treated like a queen. I was bathed in neem water, my face was smeared with oil and turmeric and I was given a turmeric massage. The priest made a chain using two red beads, three white beads and a wet thread. After the pooja this chain was handed over to five elder Devdasis, who then tied it around my neck.
After three days we reached the jogula bhavi, the bathing ghat at the foot of the Saundatti Temple. I was made to wear a dress made of neem branches. I had to run up the hill with the pot of water on my head, wearing just a few sprigs of neem! We circled the temple three times, then a priest took us before the goddess.
They laid down a blanket and put a pot on each corner, decorating them with flowers, bananas, coconut, betel and jaggery. I was told to sit in the middle. Offerings were made and grains were thrown over my head. A thread was wound around me. The priest chanted and then told me about my duties.
Upon completion of this ritual, and after returning to the village, my grandmother offered grains, food and Rs. 101 to all the elder Devdasi women in the village to officially join their group. After that they adorned and blessed me and treated the villagers with sweets and non-vegetarian food. While all were fed I carried a goddess's statue and went around the village during the rath yatra leading the precession to the temple that year.
A Devdasi told me," after you are sworn in as a Devdasi, you are no longer like before. Carrying the goddess's statue and going around is equivalent to carrying the world". At a tender age of ten these words meant a lot to me. Moreover being beautified and exhibited to the local people in the village was a big deal to me, but little did I know about the significance of this ritual.
It was evening. I approached my mother who was still sad. My grandmother kept taunting her that she should be happy that i was a Devdasi now. My mother embraced my hair and hugged me affectionately. I asked her "What happened Amma? why are you crying since morning? Why did father tie you up? Did someone hurt you? Did i do something wrong?" I asked all the questions which disturbed me.
Amma replied in moist eyes "No darling , you are my oyella hudugi, my sweetheart and you can never hurt me. I am crying because of your fate. Just to bring good fortune to our family, you were dedicated as a female servant of god. You can never marry or receive the happiness of having children and you have no idea what blows your future holds."
Mother's words surprised me. I was quite young to interpret the gravity of her statement. But today I am aware of the gruesome fact. At a vulnerable age, drawing on an ancient religious tradition, I was committed to the Hindu deity Yellamma, which made me ineligible to marry a mortal. Instead, as a means of pleasing yellama and bringing better fortunes to my family, I would serve as a "temple prostitute".
Yes I would be treated as a mere object for fun in the name of religious approbation. I would serve or rather sexually satisfy the priests and inmates of the temple, and the Zamindars (local land lords) and other men of money and power, in the village or town. For my service to them is akin service to God.When I would reach puberty, the devadasi tradition dictated that my virginity would be sold to the highest bidder.
The devdasi convention imposed many more rules. Most important is that a devdasi cannot claim to be the wife of any one man. On Tuesdays and Fridays she must go begging with a joga, a begging bowl, in her hand and visit at least five upper-caste houses. Also if one is hungry she should neither tell others, nor shall ask for food.
If a devdasi is beaten or abused, she shall not retaliate. She must provide shelter to strangers comprising maaliks, and never tell untruths. One must never separate a nursing calf from its mother, and if she crosses death, she must bathe.'
Now as I was one of them, I was to emulate all these stipulations, the reason being I was a human servant in disguise of a god servant. I was an eternal bride with no mortal husband.
