Spirit

Problems and Chaos

The questions in my head were too much for me to handle. Apperently they were too much for Maddie too, because when she got close to me she said: "Woah! One at a time!"

But I wasn't in a mood for fucking around. I just realised that I was destroying my spirit, without even realizing it.

As I got to the warehouse, the gang started greeting me, but then stopped when they saw my face. I got to the second floor and took the pills from where I was hiding them. I could here the chatter downstairs, but I couldn't care less about what they were talking about.

I stared at the pack of pills in my hands. How could something so small give me so much trouble? I got so frustrated I threw the pack against the wall. The lid bursted open and some of the pills scattered to the floor. Panicked, I hurried and started picking them up, putting them back in the pack. What the... I just realized that I forgot all about my spirit just for the sake of the pills.

That's when I broke down. I opened my mouth, and put a bunch of pills in it.

'Pathetic. Weak. Stupid. Drug user.' Voices in my head started whispering.

Shut up, shut up, shut up, I shut them off. I knew, however, they were telling the truth.

I didn't want to hear it.

I took more.

I kept trying to shut the voices up, until Jack showed up infront of me.

"Yeah, I told the invisivle people to shut up earlier, they didn't listen too."

"Jack, I'm not in the mood-"

"Oh come on! Sarcasm is always a solution. You used to use it in the hospital."

"Jack! Stop!" I yelled. Suddenly, the world started spinning. I was staggering back and forth.

"Oh man..." He said, bored. He reached his hand, passed through the skin and actually reached my stomach, and collected the pills out of my body. I did the natural thing. I vomited.

Everything went back to normal, even the guilt. I looked at Jack, outraged.

"When did I ever ask for your help, you little cunt?!" I screamed, and threw my fist at his face. He dodged it easily. "I never wanted any of this!" I tried to kick him, but I stumbled backwards and fell straight on my back. All the air escaped my lungs, but of course Jack was at the rescue. He helped me up.

When he made sure I was okay, he slapped me. "You're disgusting Luke. Just look at yourself. Using pills to escape reality. Did you think you would stay in your safe little atmosphere back in that mental hospital for so long? If I hadn't been there you would have been dead by now, and you know it."

I knew it. I didn't want to admit it. A lump formed in my throat as he continued his speach.

"If you still haven't noticed, there's a bunch of nice people down there who are trying to help you, and you're playing the badass. Well let me tell you something, you're only playing an ass."

What could I possibly say to him? He took the utmost truth and shoved it right in front of my face. He walked away, leaving me with a stack of toxic spirit-destroying pills, vomit, and a wrecked up me.

I sat on one of the sofas after I cleaned up upstairs (that is the least I could have done) and blankly stared at the T.V.. Roy made his way towards me.

"Hey, how you holding up?"

"I don't know..."

"Look, what happened isn't your fault-"

"The funny thing is that it is my fault." I turned and faced him. "Roy, I knew those pills were bad, but I took them anyways. I took them, and all my problems disappeared. The world-"

"Felt like a better place. All the bads were gone. The colors of the world were stronger, the shapes were sharper. Yeah, I know what you're talking about." He chuckled.

"You-"

"Me. I was a drug addict until Leena found me. She started helping me throughout the way, and here I am."

"Here you are, what?"

"A better person. It sounds stupid, but yes. That's what I am. I have a house, a family, a job, well kind of. I couldn't ask for anything better."

"Was it this hard?"

"Of course it was! But believe me, once you get through with it, you will feel... powerful, in a way."

I thought about that. Roy was a drug addict, and now he's not. He said it was hard, so maybe I was going the right way, since now my life wasn't exactly easy.

"Thank you." I muttered uncomfortably.

He smiled at me and went to his computers.

I spotted Leena in the books' corner, so I went to her. I needed to know where my life was headed, and she could explain some things.

"Hey Luke! I won't talk about the umm, incident that happened a while ago. What's up?"

"Why are we training, exactly? What's the point of all of this?"

She took a long breath. "Luke, casters and mortals aren't that different. They both strive power, and when they get it, they use it to get the upper hand.

"Some casters think that we have been chosen to rule, since we can access spiritual powers. They grouped themselves into an organization known as 'Hakem'. Slightly translated to Arabic, is means 'ruler'. But the organization wasn't originated from some Arabic country, for all we know.

"Even among casters, some of them think that they are stronger. And they are. They are the ones who can control one of the four elements. They think they are stronger because... well... four element, created the world, etcetera... Those casters are in control of 'Hakem'."

"And our job is to kill them?"

"'Kill' is a strong word." She chuckled.

"Although, we should." Interrupted Rob with a dark face. I remembered the time I asked him about that, he had the same expression. "If they try to rule the world, the balance between humans and mortals will be disrupted, spirits will go out of control, powers hidden to us will appear and destroy the world as we know it."

"That's not good." I said helpfully. "But still, why us?"

"Because of me." Rob said darkly.

"Rob-" Leena tried to interrupt.

"I'm an earthbender."