Dreamland Dimensions

Chapter Six: Beacon

The saddest part of being forgotten and damned isn't being ridiculed and abused. The most bitter tears I've cried were the ones as we both went back home. We had nowhere to go, living on our owns were impossible and it stung my chest unmercifully. I stood in our secret place, watching as her step-father dragged her down the slight incline. Anastasia's eyes were glued on me, tears streaming down her flush red face and her hand reaching out for me. They disappeared beyond the trees, I cursed myself for being such a coward and hoped she could forgive me.

But I could see in her eyes that we were both scared. I hated the feeling of hopelessness, I wanted to be the superhero Anastasia saw in me but I couldn't.

Fear is a disease, it holds you in my place and your heart beats out of your chest. The pounding shatters you, making you crumble to your oppressor's feet like the nothing you are expected to be. I thought of killing myself and killing my mother's boyfriend but Anastasia told me that wasn't the way to go. I just apologize to her because I'm bad at directions. I stood up, clenching my teeth and started to walk down the incline. How long did I expect us to stay in the park? I figured eventually they would come looking for her, she would be forced to go back and so would I. Not because my mother would come for me but because I had nowhere else to go. I was sure if I ran away from home and never came back, she wouldn't look for me.

The sound of sirens got closer, as I approached my house I could see three police squad cars and my mother standing outside.

All eyes divert to me, my mother collapses with tears running down her face and opens her arms. "Do you have any idea how worried your parents were?" Asked the short officer, approaching me with a stern face, "What were you doing for 4 days, son?". "He's not my dad" I retorted, pointing at Troy. The taller officer looked back at Troy, frowning and cleared his throat, "Where have you been, son?". I watched my mother fake cry, she was probably drunk or high. I scoffed, rolling my eyes and slipped between the two officers, "Excuse me officers". "Q-Quinton, wh-where have you been?" Hiccupped Mother, standing up wobbly, "You had-had me scared!". I cut my eyes at her, I loved her so much that I wished I could hate her as much as she hated me. Sometimes I wish my mother could feel how I feel but then I remember who my father was and I forgive her for hating me. "We go talk later son" growled Troy, gripping my shoulder. "I'm not your son" I hissed, glaring at him. I was frightened but I figured if he couldn't see it then maybe he wouldn't know how much of a coward I am. "This piece of shit" He scoffed, shoving me into the house. "Thank you so much, officers!" Chimed Mother, walking over to speak to them. Troy and I went into the house.

It was like a standoff, Troy standing with his back towards the door as he glared at me intently and my back to my room door.

I wasn't aware of what we were waiting for, the slightest movement or maybe for the sound of the cars driving away. My heart raced in my chest, I could hear it in my ears and I wondered in the deadening silence could Troy hear it too. I could hear the engine of the cars outside start, a sickening smirk spread across his lips and I tried to open the door. Just as I pushed it open, I felt a hand at the back of my head and it gripped my hair. I clenched my teeth, refusing to cry or scream in front of him. It happened like it's happened a million other times, Troy throws me to the floor with a punch to the face and the kicks began to come. My body had grown accustomed to the beatings but it still hurt the same and sometimes I swore every time it hurts more. My mother stands there, watching as he punches and kicks me. I looked at her through my tunneled vision, locking on to her and reached out to her.

Maybe she didn't hate me, maybe she would reach out and stop him. Realize that I'm her child and her baby.

Protect me like she use to when I was a baby, I pause in thought almost going numb to the blows. My mother gave me up, I lived with my grandmother until I was 6 years old then my mother came back and lived with us. After my grandmother died, my mother fucked up her debit and we lost the house I grew up in. We lived in parks, I started seeing images of my mother sneaking out of the sleeping bag beside me and sneaking over to a man just a few feet from me. I had seen her do it so many times, cried myself to sleep as I listened to them in the distance. My stomach turned, I threw up the contents of my empty stomach and blood. "Troy stop!". I fell to the floor, it was hard to breathe and my vision blurred. I could hear myself gasping for air like someone was choking me, my body felt stiff and I couldn't move, "M-Ma..Mama".

My eyelids dropped, everything went dark and I hoped I had died.

In the darkness, there was complete silence except for the light splash of the water beneath my feet. A light appeared in the distance, I stopped staring at it as it searched the darkness and pointed directly at me. "Hello!" I called, using my hand to block the light, "Anyone?". "Come to the light". I stepped back, the voice deep and calm. "I will take all your pain away...here the night sky is stunning". I started to walk towards the light, suddenly a cold hand grabbed my hand and stopped me. I looked back to see my Grandmother, she looked at me sadly as she placed her other hand on my cheek, "My poor grandbaby, you look like you've given up on life". "Granny" I whimpered, embracing her. "That daughter of mine has let some terrible things happen to you" Muttered Grandmother, hugging me back. I looked up at her, "Take me with you Granny". "It's not your time, you stop all this death nonsense...you're 14 years old and you haven't lived yet" She fussed, popping me lightly, "You just gotta keep going even if the sun's hidden because after the darkness they'll be light...just push through and keep running".

My Grandmother turned me away from the light, smiling at me and patted my cheek gently, "Just push through and keep running, Quinton. I'll watch over you".

I started to run into the darkness, I could hear my Grandmother behind me humming a familiar tune as she faded away but the song echoed in my head. My eyes shot open, I gasped feeling the air fill my lungs and looked around. The rhythmic beeping of a monitor caught my attention, I had an IV in my left arm and a heart monitor-clamp on my right hand. Once I realized I was in a hospital, suddenly I started to shake and cry. I just did as my Grandmother told me, I didn't want to come back not to the life I would be stuck with. "I'll watch over you". I wished I had died. The door opened and Anastasia rushed in. She ran to my side, grabbing my hand as she leaned over and rested her head on my chest, "I thought you died". "You've been unconscious for 2 days...when I found you...you weren't breathing and you were left alone" explained Anastasia, her eyes watering. I placed my hand on her head, forcing a smile and cleared my throat, "It's okay Ana, I'm not dead see". She sat up, smiling and nodded, "I see". It was selfish for me to think that I would rather be dead than by Anastasia's side. 'I'm sorry Ana'. "You can't leave me Quinton" it sounded more like a demand than a plead, "I don't have anyone else and you're the only person I live for". Honestly she was the only person I lived for too. Anastasia understood me and she shared my pain. I never had to tell her where it hurt, it's like she always knew and she had became a part of me. "Quinton, I love you" Muttered Anastasia, leaning over and kissing my forehead. "I love you too" I replied, wrapping my arms around her waist. She giggled, climbing into the hospital bed with me and cuddled into my side.

I never realized that I had became a part of her, we were vital to each other and the love we felt was different.