Things Your Mother Never Told You

"You just stick it up there?"

Okay children gather round. I have a very special news report to tell you about.

TAMPONS DONT MAKE YOU LOSE YOUR VIRGINITY!

And you can wear a tampon if you're a virgin. I can't believe that someone had asked me that.

And let me also say this, a tampon is not a dildo. I've actually heard a politician say that in an interview. He really did think that tampons were dildos. That's fucking crazy. But I do need to tell you that tampons can irritate cramps, especially if it's been awhile since you took it out. I suggest you use pads when you go to sleep or when your period is light, but you can do whatever you want. If you have a person you can talk to about this I suggest you do. Whether it's a teacher, a parent, a friend, just anyone you're comfortable with talking about your period with.

The first time I wore a tampon I had to go swimming and I had gotten my period a few days earlier. My period was pretty light, but I still wanted to make sure I didn't ink up my bathing suit and the pool.

And the first time I put it in, I had no troubles really. I just stuck the applicator in and then pushed it so the actual tampon was in there. And I'm not going to lie. It feels a little weird when you put it up there. I had never had anything up my vagina before so it was a weird sensation.

So it was in there while I was swimming and it wasn't bad or anything, felt uncomfortable, but I could live. But no one told me that it was going to be that hard to take out. I wasn't really bleeding too much, so it was really hard to take out because it had sucked all the moisture. So I shit you not, I had to literally masturbate to get moisturize down there and be able to take out this tampon.

I've learned now that you need to be bleeding to put on in because it's just not going to work at all if you're on the last days on your period.

So remember, it's not like having sex (can't believe I have to write that), make sure you're bleeding because if you're on your last days just wear a pad, and YOU CANT LOSE YOUR VIRGINITY WITH A FUCKIG TAMPON!

Okay, I'm done with my anger, bye bye now.