Life is supposed to move on.
They say change is the only constant.
Then why does it seem like,
My life is constantly on repeat.
Feel fine.
Relapse.
Eat right.
Relapse.
No cutting for a few days.
Relapse.
It's never ending.
I think I'm getting better,
And then suddenly I'm stuck on rock bottom.
***
"Look,"
Lacey said softly.
We were lying outside,
Looking up at the incredibly lit up,
Night sky.
"The thing about hitting rock bottom is,
You have nowhere to go but up.
You can bury your face in the dirt,
Or you can look up,
And catch that glimpse of light.
Then fucking chase it.
Like a dog with a laser right?
They see that tiny light,
And their only goal is to get that light."
I averted my eyes from the sky,
To her pale face.
Her hair was getting longer,
And it sprawled out around her head.
"Yeah, except the dog will never catch the light,"
I added.
"But it doesn't know that.
It just keeps trying."
We were silent for a while.
It made sense, what she said.
To have hope,
Even if nobody else expects you to--
Well, finally get the light--
All you can do is try.
And keep trying.
The light moves,
Follow it.
"Lacey,
How do you manage to keep it--
Well all together?"
I asked.
She laughed a little.
But then she was silent.
"Jake I lose it all the time.
But my problems seem petty,
Especially compared to everyone else's.
I'm not as bad as you are,
For example.
Plus I've learned to hold my composure."
Her eyes met mine.
The moon's light seemed to be reflecting,
Because in the dark I've never seen anything
So bright.
YOU ARE READING
Life Goes On (Sequel to "I'm Not Who You Think.") **ON HOLD/EXTREME REVISION**
JugendliteraturNobody should have to bury the person they love. Especially in high school. For most people, this would destroy them. But for Jake, life has to go on. Being a boy struggling with anxiety, an eating disorder, and self-harm is hard enough. Recove...
