Decisions and Regret

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I'm hiding away in my hometown. Regretting all of my life decisions. I could have been nicer to everyone. I could have been there for my sisters. For my brother. For my niece. I hear she's doing well. Sammie is treating her like her own daughter. Nobody knows where I am. Nobody. Thank The gods.

When I started writing my journal I legitimately thought. This is a nice way to keep my thoughts and feelings written down. Along with memories.

I was definitely wrong.

When looking through my bag everyday I touch this Journal's cover. And I cringe. The memories of blood and death.
Of my friends that are long past gone.

Of my sister. Who gave me the damn book.
I need help.
I need my friends.
And yet I don't.
Aria, Wren, Frost, Lilly, Sarah, Andy. All those who's deaths I cry about every night.
James.
York Peppermint Patty.

Wanting to see Bryan's face every day. Hoping for a friendly face.
Bran Muffin.

Poseidon, my cat is with me, he comes back every night to keep me company.

He was Sarah's.

I'm crying again. Dammit.

My hands shaking.

My only regret.

Not being there for my only family member who is still alive. Sarah.

Who Lilly named for our passed sister.

If she dies before I can come back I'll never forgive myself.


ARIA DON'T SOB AGAIN.

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