If Not For Love - A Highland Romance

Chapter 3

 Three

When Tavish finally returns, he is alone.

"I'm sorry," he says, taking a seat again.

"It's okay." I watch him silently studying his teacup, the muscles in his jaw twitching slightly, and I can't help asking. Something inside me needs to know. "Who is she?"

"No one important."

"O-kay." His face isn't saying she is no one important. Averting my eyes, I gaze out at the loch and watch the rippling water shimmer in the sunlight, wishing for something, anything, to drive away the sadness I suddenly feel inside. There really is no excuse for it. I mean, good grief, I have only known the man for a couple of days! But I have watched him and known him in my head for a long while now.

"It's no what you think," comes his gravelly voice. "She is someone from the past who wanted ta be more to me than she was." He takes my hand and squeezes.

"You dinna owe me an explanation."

"But I do, and if there is to be anything between us, ye need ta hear it."

I sigh. "Tell me about her."

There is indecision in his eyes for a moment. Then he nods. "First, I will tell ye a little more about meself." His fingers tighten around mine. "I am a thirty-two-year-auld man who has never been in a serious relationship with anyone, which drives me sisters bonkers. My da understands me. He kens what kind of woman it would take ta move me. Until you, I hadna met such a lass."

My heart begins to melt with his words, because he puts into words exactly what I have felt for so long. I'm thirty-five and considered an old maid by my family and acquaintances. I squeeze his fingers and he heaves what sounds like a relieved sigh.

"I met Molly when I was nineteen. She moved here from Glasgow to help her grandparents for a while. She was nice, but she wasn't for me, and though we bedded a time or two, it wasna ever more than that. For years, she made like I belonged ta her, and blethered on to others about marrying me. I finally told her one day that I didna feel that way about her and I never would. 'Twas hard to say, but I couldn't let it go on. She was angry, but she finally stopped. She left Inveraray two years ago and I hadna seen her again until today."

Though I am a little relieved by this, I can't help thinking that she is back now and things might not be over for her. Maybe she will want to pursue him again, and maybe his feelings might change. It would probably be best not to let my own feelings get involved more than they already are. I don't think I could take being hurt that way.

Something in my expression must give away my thoughts. Tavish moves his chair closer to mine and drapes an arm around the back of it. His warmth brushes against my back. "Adia, I'm no saint, but I wouldna lie to ye. What Molly wanted with me, I want with you. Her presence doesn't matter." He gently buries his fingers in my hair and I tremble at his touch. "Please believe me, lass," he says in a raspy whisper. "We can make this work. Ye're what I want."

I look into his eyes and find nothing but sincerity in them. Guiding me forward, he rests his brow against mine and I finally say, "I believe you."

* * *

As we exit the restaurant, we pass Molly, and Tavish's hand tightens around mine. He draws me closer to his side. Molly is standing just outside the door, talking with another woman. She says nothing, she simply stares, and in her eyes is a look I recognize well. I've seen it before and there are a thousand words behind it, none of them good. But just as quickly as it comes, it disappears, hidden behind the wide smile frozen in it's place.

And there is no warmth in it.