[_Lucy's POV_]
<~Flash Back~>
Death.
Why is death a part of life?
Being a 6 year old I only know so much and this was something I could never figure out.
My mother is dying and I don't know why.
Why can't I stop it?
"Lucy will you come in here please." I hear my mother call from inside her room.
I leave my toys on my floor and walk to my mother's closed door. I peek my head inside and she smiles at me.
"Come in sweetie."
I slide into the room and quietly shut the door behind me. I look down at my feet,scared to see how much my mother has changed due to her sickness.
"Lucy will you come here please. Don't be so shy with your own mother."
I slowly shuffle towards her and put my small hand on the side of her bed. She gently lays her hand over mine and looks at me with a sad smile.
Looking at how pale she has become makes tears start to form in my eyes.
"Now now Lucy, don't cry."
"But..but you're dying... And I don't want you to die." I sniffle with droplets sliding down my cheeks.
"Lucy, dying is a part of life. I was going to die sometime but now it just happens to be sooner."
"How can I stop you from dying?" I sob into her blanket.
"Lucy there is nothing you can do to stop death. It happens."
"Death is stupid! I hate it!" I yell.
"Lucy, death is only one part. There is life too. And life is a wonderful thing. One of the happiest moments I've ever endured was having you," she started to cry. "You have to do what makes you happy Lucy. Find Love and happiness and live your life to the fullest."
"But mom, I don't want to lose you!"
"I know it's going to be a bumpy ride and it's going to be scary but you have to keep holding on. You have to do this for me Lucy!" She was sobbing and she started to clutch my hand harder.
"Mom!"
"Promise me Lucy!" She yelled over the crying.
My father burst into the room.
"I promise!" I cried hugging my mother as hard as I could.
My father grabbed onto my shoulders and tore me away from my mother.
I saw her smile at me one last time before closing her eyes.
"MOM!!" I screamed as my father carried me out of the room. He set me down outside the door and rushed back into the room closing it behind him.
I sat on the floor tears streaming down my face remembering every last word my mother had said to me.
~
I almost broke that promise. The most meaningful promise I have ever made in my entire life and I had almost crushed it.
I'm sorry Mother.
~
"Lu," Levy snapped her fingers in front of my face. "Lucy!"
"Huh?" I sat dazed in front of Levy on my bedroom floor.
"Here we are talking, and I look over at you and you're staring off into space!"
"Oh, sorry. I guess I was just... Thinking."
"Well save the thinking for later because we're having our 'Mending Lucy's Broken Heart' Sleep Over!"
"Oh yeah, sorry." I feign a smile at her.
"What were you thinking about anyways?"
"Oh nothing important."
Levy looks at me skeptically.
"Alright then, um let's just talk I guess." She says setting aside her doubts.
"Okay. What do you want to talk about?"
"You and Natsu."
"What? Why do you want to talk about him and I?"
"Oh please, you can't just pretend nothing's happening between you two."
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"Stop that! You made a fricking club with the guy and yet you're still trying to convince yourself that he is your 'forever rival'"
"B-But he is..."
"Lucy. Stop it. I am your best friend. You can tell me anything."
Everything from that morning came rushing back to me.
My dream.
Natsu.
Were things really different?
"I don't know what to say Levy..."
"Are things really that complicated?"
"I need to find myself first, Levy, then the rest should come easy."
"You better find yourself fast then because not everything can stay the way it's always been. There is change coming whether you like it or not. You can't cling to the same thing forever."
That's right.
There was so much change. So much change that I didn't like and didn't want. I guess that I just wanted one steady thing I could hold onto and I knew would never change. I guess that 'thing' was being 'rivals' with Natsu... Am I really ready to let go?
"'Before you can find yourself, you must discover the things around you first.' That's what my mom always used to say." I sigh.
I'm going to have a lot of work to do.
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YO YO YO ITS ME!! I haven't updated in for-ever. O well. So I see that we have reached 1k views!! That's actually a big accomplishment to me. I never thought that people would actually read my writing. And I write some pretty deep sh*t. Well I hope that you have enjoyed this delayed chapter!
Your fellow fangirl,
Gail
