Monster

chapter eight - colours

"it's easy to hide the pain we feel, but deep down, we know it's slowly destroying us."

I jolted awake from that frightening memory that I wished I could forget, but it's not easy to forget something that has plagued your mind. My heart was palpitating, and my head was pounding, as I took a deep breath, and laid back down. Still instilled with panic and fear, I stared up at the ceiling, my chest heaving up and down. My breaths were short and quick as I sat up, taking in the same old walls of the hospital.

This is why I hated sleeping. It only stays normal for a few minutes, and that serenity is soon broken by my nightmares. Always the black demons that hauntingly grazed my mind and thoughts, leaving me frightened and scarred. Even the hoarse voice that spoke so often in my mind wouldn't leave me alone. Instead, it gave me an eternal torment, a raging tornado of fear whenever I faced anyone.

Rubbing my eyes groggily, I yawned as I stepped out of the comfort of the hospital bed. Cold chills bit at my skin with harsh coldness, as I placed my feet on the floor. The piercing, crisp coldness stinging my feet at the contact. Shivering slightly, I wrapped my arms around myself in an attempt to stop shaking.

After that, I went out the door only to be faced by a long hallway, with blindingly white walls and corridors, ignoring the sharp, stabbing pain in various parts of my body. At this early in the morning, only a few nurses were up, and most of them gave me questioning looks, which I ignored wholeheartedly. I needed a distraction, something to whisk my attention away from the blundering nightmares.

As I trudged down the long hallway, I didn't actually know where the heck I was going. I'm just relying on my instincts to get out of here, the narrow hallways and small, tight spaces making me feel like I was captured. It felt like I was ensnared into a trap, and I didn't want to be in here any longer. The immaculate condition of everything, of how everything was in pristine condition made me hate the atmosphere.

I stepped out into the surrounding forest, and breathed in the fresh air. Since running away from my pack, I never felt anything like this. I knew I shouldn't let myself wander around in the state that I was in but I couldn't help it. Birds were chirping rather noisily, the sound of animals rousing up my ears as my wolf senses took over, and I could see every little detail, hear every minor sound, as I walked into the fresh greenery of the forest.

The room I was in had a view of how far the stretch of forest covered, and it was pretty long. However, I didn't spot any lakes or anything, so I'll have to rely on my instincts, though they won't do much if I do get attacked. My body was still healing, and wouldn't stand a chance if some rogue decided to pounce on me for whatever reason.

Truth to be told, of course I wished I was stronger, so I could fight my own battles, but they just had to take away the will to fight and rebel against them, although they had already done enough damage to last a lifetime. I hated being so weak, and watching the other wolves fight just urged me more. Every time there was an attack, I would be asked to stay in the room I stayed in, which was the attic.

Countless wolves had, of course, found the unprotected hiding place, so I had many injuries, and none of the pack members had even offered to help, when one attack completely demolished the only property I owned. I walked across the forage, with a couple rays of sunlight, flooding through the small spaces between trees.

Finally, I had reached a place where a curtain of foliage hung around the two trees, and I pushed it aside to find the edge of a cliff, with a glimmering lake on the side as well. Looking over the deep fall of the cliff, I heard the whooshing sound of water rumbling below. The grumble of raucous waves splashed against the rocks of the bottom of the dangerous precipice.