The Adventures of the HMS Harlot

Part 3: Seymour Kipps, Sniper

"We've been hit." I boomed over the crow's nest.

Why am I in the crow's nest? I don't remember getting on the Harlot, or climbing up the rigging? I looked around and saw a rather large ship barreling towards us, and smoke streaming from our port side. It's never a good sign, when you come to in the crow's nest covered in vomit and another ship is shooting at you. Also, contrary to what some sharpshooters, Witherford says no one is a better shot while drunk.

I reached toward my shoulder for my rifle and only grabbed air. Oh God no. I checked again. Nothing. My pulse started to quicken as I franticly looked around the crow's nest, muttering like a madman. "No no no no."  Panic began to grip me. How did I lose my gun? Was it stolen, is it back in port? I can't fight without my rifle. What would the Old woman say? As I began to scream, Ethel climbed into the crow's nest.

"Hi Seymour, you dropped your rifle as you climbed up here." she said as she handed over my rifle. "Is everything alright?"

Apparently, my reaction was to wrap her in a bone crushing hug, while sobbing loudly. My memory was still a bit hazy, and I don't recall it exactly like this, but a few days later the entire crew has heard about the event and Eldon keeps asking me, if I would like a hug. Very embarrassing stuff. Anyway back to the crow's nest.

After several long seconds Ethel was able to escape my death grip laughing uncontrollably. For some reason I joined her.

"Witherford mentioned you went to a pub, but I had no one idea you were this drunk."

"Drunk? Ethel please I only had a few at most."

"You let go of your rifle, which is something I have never seen you do, and you threw up on Odessa before climbing up here.

"I haven't thrown up in years."

Suddenly, the Harlot turned sharply, trying to avoid fire. Ethel and I were able to hold on as Roy maneuvered the ship. I leaned over the side of the crow's nest and wretched over the side. It even came out my nose; not my finest moment on the Harlot to be honest.

"Christ." I said. "Who the hell is shooting at us?"

"The Gabriel."

"Shit. That's not good at all."

Ethel turned towards the end of the crow's nest. "I'm going to head down to see, if the Captain needs help below."

"Wait. Ethel. I need your help. Tie yourself in."

"What?"

"We are going to give the Gabriel hell but I can't aim for shit right now."

"You need me as a spotter?"

"Yes. I'm going to shoot down sails, rigging, and anything else that will slow them down but you are going to tell me where to shoot. I need the direction of the wind, how many knots both ships are going and our current altitude."

"And you might throw up again?"

"And I might throw might again."

S.Kipps