If he was mine

It wasn't like that...

We have lunch up in the hay loft because it's raining, he's been good today no awkwardness or trying to win me over we have just been friends. We sit in a comfortable silence with the beautiful wafting smell of hay around us.
"Do you want to go for a ride when your done", Rafael questions.
"Yeah sounds good", I reply with a slight nod in agreement.
We eat the rest of our lunch and head down tacking up our horses I'm riding a different horses today called King Fisher, he's a beautiful flea bitten grey around 17.5 hands he's a big horse but a soft heart. I place the saddle on his nicely slopped back, I choose a white saddle blanket because it looks good with his colour. I slip the bit in his mouth easily pulling the rest over his ears, placing the reins in my hand I walk outside of stables and wait for Rafael. The paddock out the front of the house has a huge clay whole from were the rain and cows have dug it up.
"He looks good", I hear the familiar voice behind me.
"Who are you riding", I ask.
"This is Mouse she's a bit of a handful", he says patting her neck.
"And together they both are going to be so put a helmet on", he says handing my navy blue helmet to me.
"Thanks", I respond putting it on my head.
He gives me a leg up and then jumps on Mouse himself and we head off gown towards one of the many trails around there house. We plod along with Mouse prancing around nervously at every single little sound. I keep King Fisher on a lose lead seeing he's happy enough to just have a nice ride. I really like him he's a bit hard on the bit and wants to take control but otherwise he's pretty darn good.
"I like this guy", I say softly.
"Yeah he hasn't been riden in a while because Jesse and I don't really like him, we were thinking about selling him", he says looking at me.
"What how come", I ask.
"Well he's a show pony and we don't want to waste him away in the barn or the paddock", he says.
"True but while I'm here I could compete on him if you like", I ask.
"If you want but he's hard to get a response out of when your jumping him, he likes to take charge", Rafael says patting Mouse trying to calm her down.
"I can tell but I can give it a go, I could compete in a three day event", I tell him.
"Sounds good there's one coming up around here sometime, we can put you in it if you build up his muscles again", he says in agreement.
"Sounds like a plan", I say then we fall into a comfortable silence again.
We trot and canter around the head back. It's a shame I really like King Fisher and I don't really want to get off, but I can ride him again to your layer if I have time.

We start to head back inside when I have an idea, we walk past the clay and I quickly turn and shove Rafael in.
"Izzy", he calls shocked.
"Whoops arm spasm", I try not to laugh.
Before I know it I'm being pulled in myself.
"No" I scream.
It's all sticky and slimy but fun. I swipe mud down Rafael's face, that gives me a hand full in my hair we laugh and throw it a each other. I get up starting to get cold he joins me, I go to climb out when he grabs my hand. He looks deep into my eyes I want to look away but I can't because there so intense, it's like he's seeping into my soul. He places a hand on my face I shudder under his warm hand, he leans forward and places a soft kiss on my lips than he starts to kiss me when I hear footsteps out of the corner of my eye I see Jesse standing there on the porch watching in horror I pull back pushing him lightly away on his chest. I look up at the porch and Rafael follows my gaze. Jesse turns and walks away I run after him call his name pleading for him to wait.
"Jesse please it wasn't like that", I call after him.
"I promise it meant nothing, I love you not him please just let me explain", I cry out a him.
"Would you have stopped kissing him if I wasn't there or did you just stop because you saw me", he yells at me.
"Yes I would have", I cry at him.
He shakes his head in a disbelieving way turning his back to me he walks to his car and gets in. I fall to my knees crying my heart shattering into a million pieces I here the engine start then the tiers scrapping across the graveled drive way. I can't believe this what have I done I cry my heart out begging for him to stop and come back I can't believe I let this happen I'm so stupid and careless I've broken his heart into a million pieces but the least he could do was let me explain. I stay there on my knees head in my hands crying while the sun sets behind me I feel hands pull me up off the gravel realizing that it's there dad.
"He'll be back later Izzy", he says kissing the top of my head.
"In the meantime let's go get cleaned up and warm", he says dragging me away from were I was crying and dying.
Words can't describe how bad and hopeless I feel, I get in the shower washing away the dirt, tears and the kiss that should never had happened. I get out and get into bed trying to hold it together for myself. It doesn't last long I never here him come home, but I'm determined to stay awake till he does. I here his feet climbing the stairs in twos the cute way he does then his door slam along with a shriek of pain and a crash which I guess was the wall I hear him curies under his breath. Omg I've done this making him feel this pain I cry and this time I don't hold back and I don't try and be quiet. I cry myself to sleep after his light switches off wishing I was in his warm comforting arms.

Drama Drama Drama just had to do this no hate please we are only just getting started. The main photo is of Jesse on the porch and the other photo above is Izzy in her bedroom crying. I hope you enjoyed this chapter because I enjoyed writing it the next chapter should be up tonight but I hope you enjoyed this one. Don't forget to vote and comment your thoughts.
-HannahlolDobson💕