Love, La La La

Chapter 8

A few weeks has passed by and Wonsik and the boys started planning out their comeback. We had a few songs ready for a while and I introduced the choreography to them. They were just about ready to release the news of their comeback and we were all very excited for it. The morning the news was released was the day of our three month anniversary as a married couple. We didn't have a chance to celebrate our anniversaries before so Wonsik promised he'd take me out to dinner. Wonsik was out that morning for a fan meeting where they were going to announce their comeback so I had the whole morning to myself. I made some food and lounged around the house. My phone buzzed and it was a notification from a period tracker app. I opened it and realized I was about a week and a half late. I hadn't realized what the date was and that I was so late. I'm usually very regular and I'm never late. My heart starts to race a little bit and my breath quickens. I decide to call Aetae and ask her to bring me a few pregnancy tests since I don't think it'd be a good idea for me to get them myself and have all kinds of rumors circulating already.
When I ask Aetae, she sounds very excited about the news of my possible pregnancy. I tell her to keep it secret because u don't want any rumors floating around. She stops by to drop them off and we talk for a little bit about what it'd mean if I was pregnant and though I'm nervous, I can't help but hope that these will be positive...
She leaves and tells me to let her know what the results are. I run inside and take the tests. I set them on the sink and leave the bathroom out of pure anxiety. I pace around the whole house until I'm finally mentally prepared to see the results. I look at all three of the tests. All three are positive. I shriek and jump around in excitement for a little bit before texting Aetae. I tell her that she can't tell anyone else, not even her sister. Then I call my mom and tell her that she has to come over right away. She sounds a little concerned at my urgency but I assure her it's good news but she has to come as soon as possible. She gets there in record speed and she screams as I show her one of the tests. My mom celebrates and seems so excited to become a grandmother. "How long have you known?" she asks.
"Like 20 minutes. I called you as soon as I saw the results," I reply giddily.
"Does Wonsik know yet?"
"No. We're going out for dinner tonight, I'll probably tell him then or maybe once we get back home in case he makes a scene."
"That's a good idea. We need to make you a doctors appointment so they can tell you how far along you are and what exactly you need to do right now." My mom stays with me and we talk until Wonsik gets home but we've hidden the tests by then. My mom tells Wonsik she just wanted to see me and catch up since we hadn't had any mother daughter time lately. She then says that she'll leave us alone to get ready for the big date and winks at me right before she leaves. Wonsik and I get ready and we head for the movies. We manage to go there and dinner without too many people crowding us. I contemplate telling him during dinner but I know he would be just as excited as I was and I want to let him be able to express it without worrying about people around us hearing. After a lovely night, we make it back home around 11:30. Wonsik stretches and goes into the restroom to start getting ready for bed. I stand at the mirror in the bedroom and remove my makeup and get into my pjs as quickly as possible. I take out one of the pregnancy tests I hid and put it in my pocket and wait for him on the bed. Wonsik steps out of the restroom and starts getting into bed.
"Wonsik."
"Yes?"
"I want to show you something."
"What is it?"
I smile excitedly, yet nervously as I take out the test and show it to him. He stares at it blankly for a moment, trying to understand. "You're... You're pregnant?!" he finally exclaims.
"Yes!"
He yells excitedly and throws his arms around me. We hold each other tightly while laughing and kissing. Once we've both calmed down a little bit we sit on the bed, facing each other.
"What should we name the baby?!" Wonsik asks. We throw out names and start taking our guesses about gender and talk late into the night.
"We should go to sleep, we have to be up in a few hours for practice," I finally say.
"Are we going to tell the guys tomorrow?" Wonsik asks.
"I think we should wait. I've heard that it's best not to tell everyone until the end of the first trimester," I tell him.
"Okay. Let's get some rest now," he smiles and lays down. I snuggle up next to him and he wraps his arms around me and I fall asleep smiling.
Our alarm wakes us up at 5:30 and, as usual, I spend the next 5 minutes trying to make Wonsik get out of bed. "We're going to be late if you don't get up," I say and I shake him. "Wake up~~~~. Lets go~~~~~," I plead with him. I see his eyes flicker and I know what he's about to do. Just as he reaches out to pull me back onto the bed with him, I jump out of the way and rip the blanket off of him.
"You monster!" he yells and curls up and hugs himself to get warm again. I laugh and throw him some clothes before I go into the restroom to get ready. By the time I come out, Wonsik has managed to get his pants on but is still laying in bed, clutching his shirt.
"I'm going to leave without you!" I threaten.
"I'm up!" he yells as he jumps out of the bed. "I'm up, I'm up," he croaks as he sleepily struggles to put his shirt on.
"It's inside out," I say as I walk past him toward the door.
"Aish," he groans loudly once I'm out of the room. I chuckle as I head downstairs to make us some breakfast. Just as I finish our breakfast, Wonsik comes downstairs, still rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. I hand him his food and we jump in the car. We eat as we drive and make it to the studio at 6:45. We walk into the practice room and find Hakyeon already inside, covered in sweat.
"Hello," I murmur as I throw my bag on the floor.
"Hi!" Hakyeon pips.
Wonsik simply makes a sound through his yawn to greet Hakyeon and sits on the floor to take a nap.
"I watched the dance videos you sent me the other day. I came early to practice a bit so I could help you teach everyone else," he explains.
"Great. Thank you, Hakyeon. I hope you got some rest though, you must have gotten here really early," I reply.
"I made sure to go to sleep really early," he assures me.
We go through some of the dances and he seems to have all of them memorized already. As we finish the last one, Hongbin and Taekwoon walk in the room. "Hello," they mutter in unison. They look at us, then Wonsik and sit next to Wonsik and instantly fall asleep.
"Are Hyukkie and Jaehwan almost here yet?" I ask.
"Jaehwan texted me earlier and said he was on his way. I haven't heard from Hyuk," Hakyeon replies.
Just then the door flies open and Jaehwan dances in. "Hello family," he announces.
"Now we just need Hyukkie," I say.
"I'll call him," Hakyeon says. He takes out his phone and dials the number. "Where are you?.... Well hurry up, we're waiting..... Okay.... Okay see you soon," he hangs up and turns to me. "He'll be here soon. Want to go over that second dance again? I still don't think I'm doing it quite right."
"Sure," I reply. Just as we finish the choreography, Hyuk bursts into the room with seven cups of coffee.
"This is why you were late?!" Hakyeon asks, almost angrily.
"Oh bless this child," Hongbin says as he crawls to the coffee. We each take our coffee, tell Hakyeon to lighten up and sip happily until we've finished and feel more alive.
"Alright!" I announce. "Hakyeon has memorized the choreography already, have you guys practices at all?"
"I watched the video you sent us a few times..." Jaehwan says. As I look from each of them, I can tell none of them have done any more than that.
"Alright, we've got a long day ahead of us then. Get up! Get up, get up, get up," I command as I push them to their feet. I position them as I wanted. Hakyeon helps me show them the choreography and within an hour, we've finished almost the whole first dance but I'm starting to feel strangely weak. I ignore it and keep going until everyone seems to have the whole dance down. I start feeling a little lightheaded but I decide not to tell anyone since I don't want them worrying about me. Fortunately, I usually just show them the dance, help them learn it, then sit and watch them practice so I can make changes or correct them if I need to. I grab a chair and my water and try to rest while also paying attention to them. They practice a few times at normal speed and a few times at faster paces. Once I'm satisfied with their improvement and I feel a little better, I stand up to start the next dance.
"This one was the hardest for me," Hakyeon comments as we start. They seemed to learn this one a little faster than the one before and we start practicing at normal pace. Right as we get into the intricate part of the dance, I suddenly feel very sick. I stop, place one hand over my stomach and one over my mouth and shut my eyes.
"Rigi!" Wonsik runs to my side and places his hands in my head. "Are you okay?" The rest of the boys stop dancing and crowd around me. I feel my breakfast coming up so I push them out of the way and run to the restroom. Wonsik follows and kneels beside me as I vomit into the toilet. He comforts me and once I've finished, I wipe my mouth and try to get to my feet. Wonsik helps me up and to the sink so I can wash my mouth. After, I've rinsed and taken a deep breath he asks me how I'm feeling.
"I'm okay. I had been feeling a little queasy the past few days but I figured it was nothing. I think I just ate too early and then did way too much moving around right after."
"Do you think it's the start of morning sickness?" he asks, looking concerned.
"Probably," I mutter.
"Are you sure you can do this? We should probably see a doctor. Even if the doctor says it's okay, you shouldn't do it if I makes you feel this sick. Hakyeon knows the dances. We can just have him teach us," he says.
"I'm okay. I already made a doctors appointment anyway when my mom was over. I'll just take it a little more slow from now on. If we have to, I'll work something out with Hakyeon. I'll probably tell him my situation if it comes to that, I know we can trust him, it'll just be a bit suspicious with the boys."
"Okay. Just take it easy for the rest of the day," he says. I nod and we had back to the practice room.
"Are you okay?" "What happened?" They ask as soon as I step into the room.
"I'm fine. I think I just ate too much a little too early and then did too much exercise too suddenly. I'm okay now," I say, not quite sure what excuse to give them.
"This hasn't happened before..." Hakyeon says.
"Yeah, I'm not quite sure what happened. I'm okay though, I'll just teach you guys the moves and then you can practice it at normal speed by yourselves, Hakyeon can help you guys if you need it," I murmur.
"Yes, you should take it easy," Taekwoon says. We manage to get through all eight songs before finally calling it a day since we're hungry and ready to go to sleep. We order some food and sit around in a big circle to eat. Once we've all had our fill, we go home to get some sleep since we have another day of practicing ahead of us.
"Do you think you'll be okay tomorrow?" Wonsik asks
"Hopefully," I mutter. We go to bed and wake up early the next day. I nibble on some carrots instead of eating a full meal in the morning. I start feeling a little nauseous on the car ride to the studio so I close my eyes and try to steady my breath.
"Are you okay?" Wonsik asks.
"Just a little dizzy," I reply. We go inside and again, Hakyeon is there before us.
"How are you feeling?" Hakyeon asks me.
"I'm okay. I'll probably just watch you guys and make sure it all flows well," I respond.
"Sounds good," he says. Once everyone is there, Hakyeon leads practice so I can watch. I stop them a few times to correct a few mistakes and show them how to make the whole dance better. This goes on the the next few days until they film the first music video. We go through the motions and within a few months, the music videos for the this album, all the dance practices and film making are out. At this point, I'm about three weeks away from the end of my first trimester. My pants are starting to fit a little tighter but I'm excited to finally be over with the first trimester morning sickness and out of the biggest danger zone of miscarriage. As much as I fear the stretch marks, I can't wait to have a huge belly. And I also can't wait to tell all my friends that I'm pregnant.
"I know we wanted to wait until it was completely over... But what if we told the boys tomorrow?" I suggest to Wonsik as we lay in bed.
"Do you think that's a good idea?" he asks.
"Well it's the day of your comeback stage, we're going to have a big dinner, it seems like the right time, don't you think?"
"I guess. It has been hard keeping it a secret from them. Maybe then we'll have an easier time on the tour since everyone will know you're pregnant too," he says.
"That's true. Let's tell them tomorrow then."
"Tomorrow." Wonsik smiles gleefully at me and moves down to put his head on my belly. "Hi baby. How are you doing in there? Is momma keeping you nice and warm? I can't wait to see you. Stop being so mean to your mom too, okay? You've been making her sick. You'll be giving us all kinds of trouble later, you could at least take it easy on your mom right now, can't you? She's keeping you safe and you're making her sick. I love you baby, I hope I can hold you soon," he kisses my belly and falls asleep with his head still resting on my stomach. I stroke his hair and look down and him, excited for what the future holds for us.
I'm awoken by some cramps. I think for a second that maybe it's because Wonsik has been laying on my stomach the whole night but it doesn't take me long to realize that's not the case. The cramps slowly get worse and worse and I can feel the spotting.
"Wonsik...." I call out shakily. He groans softly in response. "Wonsik. Wonsik, honey please wake up, I think something is wrong," I plead with him.
"What? What's going on," he sits up and as his eyes adjust, he sees the tears in my eyes. "What's wrong? Are you okay?"
"I'm having cramps, they're really bad. My whole abdomen and lower back feel like it's being crushed," I choke out through my tears.
"I'm calling an ambulance," he jumps out of bed, turns on the light, scrambles to find his phone and dials the number.
I take the blanket off of me and see that my pants and bed are stained with blood. I start sobbing as soon as I see all the blood. "I'm sorry," I cry. "I'm so sorry. I couldn't keep you safe. I'm so sorry."
Wonsik hangs up and rushes to my side again. He looks at the blood, then my tearful face. Tears begin to well in his eyes and he hugs me tightly. "It's not your fault," he whispers. "You did the best you could, it's not your fault." I can tell he's trying to be strong for me but his voice cracks while he tries to comfort me and it only makes me cry harder.