Wow, Clubs Are Hard to Start

who was i when i wrote this

CHAPTER 6

Mikey gives Pete his number before he goes.

Pete doesn't text anyone else for the rest of the weekend.

Well, that's not exactly true. Gabe texts Pete all of Saturday night (but only after Pete said he couldn't call him), and Brendon texts at one am on Monday saying, "Get here early, we're going to fuck money and get bastards."

Pete snorts. "Do you mean get money fuck bitches?"

"No. I'm gay. Get 2 school early. ;) "

If only Pete had asked Brendon to clarify what he was planning. Maybe he wouldn't have joined them.

Pete shows up thirty minutes early, standing outside the school entrance. Brendon and Gabe are already there, wearing all black. He even has on a ski mask.

"Please don't tell me you're going to steal the squirrel statue." Pete says. He's slightly relieved when Brendon shakes his head, but then grows worried again when Brendon pulls off his ski mask and grins, wide.

"Better," Brendon whispers, and Pete gives up on his friend. Brendon was raised by Catholic parents, get's mostly straight A's in school, and generally avoids conflict. At least up until sophomore year, when Gabe and Pete got involved. Then he was batshit crazy.

Like now.

Pete doesn't resist when Brendon hands him a a ski mask. Gabe is wearing his ski mask like a beanie, but Pete puts his on too, and they follow Brendon into the school. "Where are we going?"

"Surprise." Brendon whispers back. Gabe grins knowingly. They dart down the hall, go around a few corners, and make in front of one of the math classroom.

Brendon holds up his hands like a finger gun. He's on one side of the door, Pete on the other side. His eyes are very, very serious as he lifts up his fingers. Three, two, one...

Brendon kicks down the door, lifting his finger gun in the air. Because Pete is a loyal, he follows. Brendon yells, "HANDS UP, NOW."

The room is filled with at least twelve students, a few lifting their hands into the air. There's a giant gold squirrel statue in the corner. Banners with acorns are hung across the wall. Someone is lighting a squirrel shaped candle in the center of the room.

Brendon and Gabe are pointing their finger guns at people and saying things like, "This is a robbery. Nobody move!" When they have everyone's attention, Brendon clears his throat and says, "Squirrel Appreciation Club, you are currently being robbed."

Pete has no clue what's going on.

"We are the Squirrel Admiration Club." One of the boys steps forward. Pete recognizes him as Luke Hemmings, from sophomore year. He has a lip ring, but he's what Pete's hero, Ebony Dementia Dark'ness Raven Way, would call a "prep."

"Does it matter? It's still robbery." Brendon pokes Luke's chest. "You're lucky I don't want anything though."

"You said we wouldn't steal the statue." Pete hisses.

"We're not." Brendon says. He looks Luke in the eye. "Are you the President of this club?"

Luke scowls and turns away. Before anyone can say anything, a voice is heard from the doorway. "I am."

Pete, Brendon, and Gabe swivel around to see the guy staring defiantly at them. He has a pout and a huge amount of eyeliner, enough to rival Pete.

Pete's about to fight this boy (who the fuck wears more eyeliner than me?) but he's more worried about Brendon, who has his eyes narrowed at this fairly adorable boy and could probably do harm.

"You need to leave now." Brendon demands. "This is a robbery."

"Haven't you people ever heard of closing the goddamn door?" The boy asks. Pete recognizes him, but he can't quite place a name, even when he keeps talking. "You have to close the door during a robbery, stupid."

"Dude, you're the one running this dumb club." Brendon waves at the other fourteen members of the Squirrel Admiration Club. "What's your name, anyways? Grey squirrel? Emo Squirrel?"

"Hey," Pete protests, but Brendon's too busy trying to pick a fight.

The boy slams the door behind him. His eyes look absolutely murderous. "I am Ryan Ross."

Ryan Ross. Of course. Pete should have known. He's heard rumors about this guy; Ryan sometimes getting shoved around, people yelling fag or gaylord at him in the hallways. Pete would defend him, but, well... They didn't know each other that well, and he already has enough trouble dealing with homophobic slurs on his own. Besides, they stopped messing with him about a month ago for reasons unknown.

Ryan doesn't seem to recognize Pete with the ski mask though. If he does, he doesn't seem troubled that Pete never defended him. He's just glaring at Brendon. "Dude, take your henchmen and leave. I have a club to run."

"You did not just call me a henchman," Gabe mutters. He turns to Brendon. "Beebo?"

Brendon pulls out a lighter from his pocket, and flicks it open. Well, fuck. They're too deep in this to get out of trouble, so Pete looks Ryan in the eye and says, "Light em up."

"We can report you for violation of Health and Safety." Luke snaps, but Gabe pushes him back. Luke turns to Ryan, waiting expectantly for Ryan to do something. But Ryan is just staring at Brendon with a strange look on his face.

"What's your name?" He demands. Pete exchanges glances with Gabe, before turning back to the two. Ryan probably wanted their names so he could report them.

Brendon snatches his ski mask off his head, and tosses it to the side. "I'm Brendon Urie." He says confidently. He stands up straighter, looking Ryan in the eye. "And I am the co-vice-president of the Paranormal Observational Troop."

"What were you trying to rob, Brendon Urie?" Ryan says his whole name. This is ridiculous.

"A few members. Only the best ones, of course, and we'll probably give them back after Christmas."

"Members," Ryan repeats. His face has gone from stern to slightly amused.

"Yes." Brendon points at Luke. "I definitely don't want this one. Maybe her," He points to doll-face Debby Ryan, and then a sophomore. "Or him. Callum. I recognize him."

"You won't take any of them." Ryan sounds calm. He has a smirk on his face.

This just pisses Brendon off more. "And you know this, how?"

Ryan takes a few steps forward so he's nose to nose with Brendon. Pete can hear Brendon's breath hitch. "Because you'll take me, instead."

Everyone in the room gasps. Even Pete's own eyes widen, like he can't believe this. Ryan is not going to report us?

Brendon looks Ryan up and down, his cheeks slowly glowing more and more red. Finally, he steps backwards. Like everyone else, he's in disbelief. "You'll join our club then? You'll be quitting this one, then."

"Until Christmas." Ryan corrects. He turns to Luke. "You're in charge while I'm gone. Do not change anyone's positions. Email me if you need any help."

"Yes, President." Luke says. Ryan pulls a string necklace out from under his shirt. On it is an acorn, and he puts it Luke's palm.

"I'm trusting you, Luke." Ryan whispers. Luke nods, blinking like he's trying not to cry. Pete wants to yell that this whole thing is stupid, but clearly everyone in the Squirrel Admiration Club is sharing an intimate moment.

"I expect to see you soon." Brendon says to Ryan. "If you'll excuse us, we need to go meet with our own club. If any of you report this, remember..." He pauses to lift up the match. "We will know."

"Revenge will come." Callum says. "We will have our leader back."

"Not until after Christmas." Gabe says, grinning. He takes Pete's hand and they follow Brendon out the door, where Joe and Patrick are waiting.

"Success?" Joe asks.

"Heist complete." Brendon replies, breaking into a huge grin.

Ryan Ross sits with them during lunch.