Cuts and Romance

Chapter 23: Cosmic Jokes

Weightless.

Am i dead?

It was a cosmic joke. We only became a couple for a few hours then a tragedy happens. Why can't i just be happy? Don't i have a right to it? After what we have been through don't we at least deserve a chance at that?

Ba-bum

Was that.... My heart beat?

Ba-bum

I was dead?

Ba-bum

What caused it to beat again.

Ba-bum

Then my eyes opened.

Blinding lights. White. That was all i saw.

"Mary? Mary? Are you awake?"
A familiar voice said.

I wante to answer but I couldn't move, I couldn't speak. With a great effort i turned my head to source and found a familiar figure beside me lying on anothe bed.

"Hey." Nathan smiled.

"Hey." I croaked. Then i felt the pain. Needles and pins seem to penetrate every part of my body but worst of all my chest. I almost couldn't breathe.

"Mary calm down. You had a heart surgery. You've been unconscious for three days. Calm down. You're still in a critical state."

"Hea...heart surgery?"

"Yeah. More like transplant. You're heart was way too damaged to patch up. You were dead for a few minutes when they were replacing it. Don't worry. The heart was from a donor a long time ago. Luckily i drove like hell to get here. Actually had three police cars tailing me." He said this so easily as if it was just another day.

"So this heart..... Isn't mine?"

"No Mary. But don't feel guilty okay? Just rest." He said soothingly. After a few moments he made me fall asleep by humming our song.

Dream mode on.

I was back in that fateful night. This time i was watching the whole scene in a third person view like a movie. I saw myself being dragged by Nathan to the mustang. Then the car came speeding in. The driver.... The driver was... My father. He face was tear stained he was obviously drunk. He avoided us and swerved and then the explosion. Nathan covered me and i saw him being impaled by several shards of metal. Blood dripped down his body. Then one tore right through and hit me. Pain. I woke up screaming and a nurse came and gave me morphine.

"Hey sweetie. It's just a dream. Go back to sleep." She said.

I whimpered. "I don't want to. I can't. The nightmares. It's all my fault." I cried softy.

Nathan still slept soundly his features relaxed and peaceful.... And happy.

A wave of guilt washed over along with morphine. "It's all my fault. If it weren't for me he wouldn't have to be hurt. He wouldn't have to be burdened by me." I said as tears fell to me. The nurse left and i just couldn't seem to stop the tears that flowed until I succumbed to the drug induced sleep.