Afraid Of Falling

Chapter One - I feel like a cliché...

The worst summer holidays of my life are finally drawing to a close, I'm just not sure I'm ready for what's to come.

******

The air dances like a sheer silk against my skin, this summer morning is mild, well as mild as it gets - the sun is yet to rise but here I am lying in bed, a bed that still feels foreign to me. You see I'm here in Aunt Rae's house on the outskirts of a town in the middle of nowhere. This is not how I pictured my first day of being a senior in High School at the start of this summer...

I shouldn't think back on it, the accident that changed it all and was the catalyst for this forced ostracization from my life - but I couldn't help that it was all that was in the forefront of my mind. I just wish I met my Aunt under better circumstances, I mean Aunt Rae means well, with her unruly curly hair - a family trait it seems - her mismatched hemp outfits, and the vegan diet. She was a true hippie, but a hippie that wants to help me, but forcing me to move on with 'meditation and yoga' is just not going to work, how am I supposed to rid myself of this waking nightmare with a little 'clearing of the mind' and a morning 'salute to the sun'.

I let my thoughts swirl, dangerously as I lay in bed waiting for it to be a suitable hour for me to roll out of bed and pretend I just woke up, rather than the truth which was that I have had a grand total of 3 hours sleep. What all my thoughts back to what happened before I moved here and then with the first day at my new school being today...

School...

Waroc High School - this is so not something I want to do, it's hard enough starting Year 11 - let alone starting Year 11 in a brand new school in your mum's hometown, where everyone has known each other since they were in nappy's with their friendship groups firmly in place and the small town syndrome of no-one trying anything new nothing ever changing, I mean seriously they don't even offer Visual Art as a subject...

I rolled over again and looked at my clock 6:45am, perfect, now I can get up...

...here goes nothing

******

After my shower, I walk back to my room, the good thing about this school I guess is that the uniform only dictates the shirt - a white polo with the school's emblem in the extremely cliché place of "over the heart" - I grab my black jeans, my black converse and through my bra strap length, dirty blonde, curly hair into a messy bun and head into the kitchen. Aunt Rae is already in there preparing one of her Kale Smoothies, which looked exactly like she'd taken the grass and weeds out of the garden and just blended them with water.

"Good morning Ella!" she chirped as she heard me walk in "All ready for -" She stops as she looks in my direction.

"Morning Aunt Rae, i-is there something wrong with my outfit?" I ask, knowing full well she's confronted by the fact that I look just like my mother, and probably the extreme favouritism I show towards the colour black - Aunt Rae however looked like a rainbow threw up on her - I think she's wearing enough colour for the both of us...

"Oh - ah - no of course not! I - uh - just thought you might want one of my amazing orange and kale smoothies! It has Flax!" she over compensated so much with the enthusiasm, it was hard not to smile at her

"No thanks, I think I'll stick to good ol' peanut butter on toast" I replied, sure - it was of the vegan variety mind you, and | will definitely be needing a coffee...if this small town school even has coffee in their cafeteria...
I walk to the bench and start organising my breakfast, fantasising about coffee and how strong I want it to be when my reverie is interrupted by a nervous sounding Aunt Rae.