[sorry spaces between posts are lulling! I'm writing mroe and getting less feedback so i hvae less motivation to writee. Also I will be at my dads this weekend so writing will be harder to get around to, I shall do my best though!But I do wanna say thanks to all my fans and people who leave me comments with what they think! I love yall :)) shout outs to: hunnii, skater girl, and babisaza25 for being so supportive of me! love u guys!]
[sorry for talking so much haha, this post is a longer one I guess... lets you see a litte more into joshs and kendalls realtionship. dont hate me anyone who is team josh! (the story aint over yett)]
[read, vote, comment, tell me what u think pretty please! constructive critism always welcome :)]
FIFTEEN: Kendall
I was the first to pull away from Mark's warm embrace. I looked up at his face with dry eyes and was in awe of him. His shining emerald green eyes had a glint in them that reminded me of a mix of innocence and hope. His dark chocolate brown hair glided effortlessly over his right eye while the rest of his hair looked perfectly tousled. Our bodies were still close enough that I could feel his muscular form up against me. He was breathtakingly gorgeous and just looking into his eyes made my patched heart begin to melt.
As I gazed into his captivating eyes I felt his hand reach out and tuck a fallen curl behind my ear. His hand lingered there until he began to glide his hand across my skin, leaving it to rest on my cheek. His skin against mine sent tingles of electricity throughout my whole body and I subconsciously began focusing in on his lips. His soft lips were caught perfectly between a worried frown and a mesmerized smile. While focused on his lips I saw them moving closer to me as I realized he was leaning in. My heart began to race and my pulse became so strong I could feel it in my ears. My whole body buzzed with longing to kiss him but my brain stepped in. "WHAT AM I DOING," I screamed at myself. I broke the eye contact between us and looked out across the park to the dark mob of people now following the casket over to the gravesite. "We better head over that way," I stated shakily as I pulled away his strong arms from around me. "I just want to thank you Mark, even though I didn't exactly arrive here on the best terms with you, you still came and supported me in my time of need. You came through for me more than my own fiancée, and if that doesn't say that our friendship can survive, I don't know what does." I looked back into his eyes that no longer shined as they had a moment ago. They were clouded over by a deep emotion that I could not make out.
"Ken I'll always be here for you, and I would want more than anything for us to put the past behind us and just go back to the friendship we had," was his reply and I felt my heart sink at the thought of going back to friends and nothing more, could I really do that? "I at lease owe it to both of us to try," I concluded to myself.
"I'm glad," I smiled. "Now we better get back down there." I turned and began to walk back towards the crowd my knees still trembling with the stale feeling of unfulfilled desire. I turned to see if Mark was following, but saw he had not moved from where we had been standing.
"I'll catch up with you," he smiled at me and I felt my heart pull a little in his direction as I looked at his pearly grin. As I turned back around I let all my subconscious thoughts flood into my consciousness. "Way to go Kendall, he wanted to kiss you," the devils advocate in my head sneered. "You have a fiancée, and Mark is ancient history. Remember he was the one who ended it," my conscience retorted. "Was he not leaning in?" The devil questioned. "Ask yourself this, did you feel the need to validate your "just friends" status in front of Mark for his sake? Or was it for your own?" As I approached the group I silenced the argument in my head but pondered the last question. Did I think Mark needed to be told were just friends? Or did I need to assure myself that's all we will ever be again?
