Sixty Degrees (BoyxBoy)

Talking?

"Please, Levi. Please just stay."

He does nothing.

"I just need to talk to you, I don't want you to hate me," His voice comes out pathetic and weak.

"Hate you?" He repeats slowly, as if testing the words for himself. "I don't hate you, Eren Yeager."

It feels like a physical punch to the gut every time Levi calls him by his full name. "Then what?" He asks, thinking back to the night it happened, the way Levi had looked shaking as he cowered in fear.

"Are you afraid of me?"

Levi's eyes widen as the words leave Eren's mouth. He never realised before just how perceptive Eren actually is. Still he says nothing.

"Levi, please. Just talk to me!"

"Why?" He yells, startling Eren. "The last time we talked I got punched in the face. Why the fuck do you think I want to talk to you?"

"You know I didn't mean to do that," He replies, feeling small.

Levi lets out a harsh breath, letting the silence drag on. "I know that," He answers finally. "But it changes nothing."

"I just, I don't want this to be the end for us," Eren mumbles, staring down at his feet.

"I don't either. But this is where we are."

Eren lifts his head to look at Levi; the man's face is carefully composed into a blank mask. How did things turn out this way? Only six months have passed since he first saw Levi walking across the quad, even when he flipped him off in the cafeteria he felt drawn to him. And through their good moments and their many shitty days this is all they get? Eren can't help but think how unbelievably unfair the world is. And yet he can think of nothing to fix all the mistakes they've made to get to this point. He just knows that he wants Levi, he can't imagine living his life day to day without him there.

He hadn't moved across the country in the hopes of finding someone, he was focused on school and books and back then that was all he needed. But Levi through no real action of his own twisted himself so completely into his life and now he's not sure what he'd be without him. That's why he'll fight, though his friends will tell him that he should let it be, that his relationship with Levi is not a healthy one, because honestly he's not strong enough to even try to live without him.

Levi is the only one who can tell him to stop trying. And every time he has, Eren has felt as if he never truly meant it. But perhaps that's why, because he keeps trying to fix something that has always been broken and he's hurting both of them in the process. Even so, he'll take all the hurt if it means he can be with him.

"I don't want things to end like this," He says again, making sure Levi knows.

Levi who had been watching him the whole time blinks slowly. "We're already over."

The words cut Eren so deeply he only manages to open his mouth to reply when Levi has already walked out of the room.

~~.~~

He knows he played a major role in ruining the relationship, but honestly though he tried, he never saw them going anywhere. He's aware that his actions have not always been for the better, but he was in it for the fun. As horrible as that sounds he only got with Eren in the first place because he thought it would be a good distraction from school. And it wasn't because Eren is Eren and he felt particularly drawn to him, he would have done it with anyone. It was only because Eren was so insistent on spending time with him that he allowed it to go as far as it did.