When You Left... (Prequel)

Ch.16 - Panic

Panic

N A T E S P O V (2 Weeks Later)

Today we have to present our projects in science, I am not looking forwards to it. Me talking in front of everyone? No thank you I'll pass, but we both have to speak in order to get marks. So I convinced Marc to let me just tell everyone what our project is and let him do the rest, which he agreed to for some reason. Maybe because he hasn't done that well in science and this might be a chance to raise his grade, at least I didn't have to do all the work by myself like I normally have to.

I've somewhat become a lot more comfortable around Marc, I joke around with him, we sometimes hang out on the weekends, he says hi to me when he sees me around school. The bullies are still at it, like I said it's not as bad as before. Marc is becoming my guardian Angel, I think I'm starting to appreciate this side of Marc more. I always had a part of me hoping that he would be nice, turns out it was right. Yet I still don't understand how he can be seen with me and still hang around with Carter, but I'm trying not to question it.

Did I mention that everyone still calls me a slut? No? Well I did now, every time I'm seen with Marc someone will point it out. Call me a slut or man whore, I'm pretty sure half of them don't know what it means. Yet for some reason it still hurts, hence why I faked being ill to get off school last week. It was only a day though, I had a 'melt down'. Drew stayed with me to help me through it, then I felt bad because he had a sport test thingy which he was actually quite excited for. He missed it because of me, so I was upset all day, but he keeps trying to convince me that it's fine because he did it on Friday instead. I still feel bad.

I'm currently standing beside Drew while he gets his books out his locker, I still got a while yet until we have science. Gives me time to get myself together, I really don't like speaking out in front of people. I get really anxious, I don't really wanna have an attack because of speaking out in front of people. Do you know how embarrassing that would be? Plus I won't have anyone to help me, Drew's not in my class. My brother is out doing whatever, my other brother has forgotten about me and of course my parents aren't here. I don't think I've had an attack by myself before.

I let out a squeak feeling someone slap my behind, turning around I see Marc. He chuckles winking at me, I roll my eyes watching him catch up with Carter and the others. I turn back to Drew trying to ignore the whispers and stares directed at me, Drew gives me the look I've become very familiar with 'wtf?' I shake my head with a shrug, he rolls his eyes which I've noticed has become very common whenever there's something involving Marc.

He had a massive go at me because I went to the cinema with Marc, a full blown go at me. Then he stormed out and didn't talk to me for the rest of the day, it was the weekend by the way so I was bored for the most part. I can tell that he really hates Marc but I don't know why he took it out on me, so yeah my 2 weeks of being clean went out the window. Of course no one knows about this still, it's not something I want to talk about. To anyone, not even Drew.

"Let's go before we're late" Drew mutters before leading the way, I sigh following behind.

...

I feel someone nudge me snapping me out of my daydream more like deep thoughts, I look over at Marc who smiles beckoning me closer. I look at the space between us then back at him, we are sat next to each other. Can we get any closer than this? I shuffle closer seeing him do the same, he leans over and whispers in my ear

"I must be the sun and you must be earth, cause the closer we get the hotter you become"

I blush slapping him playfully before moving away, this is what I have had to deal with the whole time we have been working on the project. He'd come up with a new science pick up line almost everyday, and of course my body decides to respond to them by blushing. Sometimes I hate my body, actually I have always hated my body. Let's rephrase that, sometimes I really hate my body. 

"Okay next up Nate and Marc"

Oh shiz

Marc stands up and I look at him with a look saying 'please don't make me do this'. "Come on" he says leading the way, I sigh standing up. Everyone's eyes are already on us, I feel myself getting more nervous. I think my anxiety is kicking in again. Great.

We make it to the front our project already on show, Marc looks at me to introduce it but the words can't form. My breathing picks up and the stares of everyone makes me more uneasy. I can hear the teacher saying something but I can't make out what it is, suddenly I'm being pulled away. I can't feel the stares of everyone anymore, It's quiet.

I'm blink trying to clear my vision "Nate, can you hear me?"

I nod to whoever is speaking to me, "breathe out for me on the count of three"

"One...two...three"

I follow their instructions. 

Not too long after my breathing is back to normal, I open my eyes which I closed at some point. "You okay?" Marc asks, wait he just witnessed me almost have a panic attack. The class just witnessed me almost have a panic attack. Great, just great. Let's see how long this takes to spread around the school.

"I'm fine" I mumble not looking him in the eye, "thanks" I add on. I see him nod and hold his hand out, I take it letting him help me up.

We slowly walk back in the class room to see the pair that did their presentation sit down, "ah Marc and Nate. Would you like to do your presentation now or waste more time?" The teacher asks, some people snicker and laugh.

I feel my cheeks heat up as I look to the ground, "yeah we'll do it now" Marc says ignoring what she said.

I follow behind him as we go back up to the front of the class room, I don't look at anyone as I clear my throat quietly. "We decided t-to do o-our p-project-" I start but get cut off by someone,

"Speak clearer I c-can't u-understand y-you" they say clearly mocking me, everyone laughs or giggles. My cheeks darken even more, I can feel the tears already brimming in my eyes. Wow great start Nate.

I feel someone take my hand making me look over, Marc gives me a sad smile. "Don't listen to them" he whispers, I nod looking back down. Oddly I feel comforted by his touch. 

"We did our project a-about space" I say quickly just getting it done with, I know there's a part that I need to say in the middle but for now Marc is doing the most talking.

I listen to his voice as he explains our project, my eyes still not meeting anyone's. My hand still in Marc's, fortunately our project is on the table in front of us so no one can see what we're doing.

About half way through his speech he intwines our fingers causing me to bite back the smile threatening to show.