empty → nate maloley

seventeen

nate shushed me as we stepped in his house, he told me the guys were probably sleeping. i slowly walked in and he quietly closed the door behind us. he took charge and grabbed my hand, quietly leading us to his room. 

"well look who it is." sammy smirked. they were all awake. "and is that mia behind you?" 

i blushed when all the boys had smirks on their faces. 

"yup and were going to bed, goodnight." nate said to them before grabbing my wrist and dragging me into his room. he chuckled and shut the door behind him. "sorry bout that, mama."

"i guess they're not used to you sneaking girls in at three in the morning?" i lightly laugh, teasing. 

"well..." nate trailed off making me thin my lips. right. "let's not talk about that." he said and wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me down onto the bed with him. 

he laid on the left and i laid on the right and we just sat there staring at each other. 

"why do you always wear that man bun?" i ask, reaching up to flick it. 

he laughed and reached behind his head, taking it out. "it's my style. what? do you not like it?"

i shrug, "it's just so messy and lopsided." i laughed. "let me do it one day, i can make a mean bun."

he laughed and licked his lips, nodding. "aight mia, from now on your job is to do my man bun for me." 

through out the night we ended up talking about random shit. he asked me questions about my childhood and life with and without my mom; things that he didn't already know and i asked him about things he did throughout his life. we laughed the whole night, i'm pretty sure the guys were fed up with us because of how loud we were. we talked about his passion for music and him telling me that my music taste sucked because i listened to trash and me arguing back saying that he didn't know good music if it hit him the face.

around five, we finally became sleepy and somehow my head laid on his chest and his arm around me, like usual. i took a deep breath and finally decided to bring up the topic i had been avoiding. 

"nate?" i whisper. 

"hm?" he answered back. he was drawing shapes into my skin and it was honestly relaxing me. 

"that day i caught you with that girl... were you going to have sex with her?" i ask, terrified of the answer.

i hear nate take a deep breath above me. "yeah." he said.

"oh."

"you wanna know why i brought her over to fuck?" he asks. 

i cringe at his words but accept. "sure."

"remember how i told you i was scared?" i nodded. "well you're the thing that scared me." 

i furrow my eyebrows and get up and prop myself on my elbow so i can look at him. "what? why were you scared of me?"

he shrugged and started to rub my arm, i knew he was trying to relax me. "i didn't think i could love another girl they way i did with mary jane, then here you come along and fuck things up for me. i wanted to see if those feelings were real, so i asked her to come over to fuck to see how i would afterwards-"

"how did you want to feel?" i ask interrupting the story. 

"guilty." he answered. "if i felt guilty afterwards, i knew the feelings were real. but when i saw your face, everything changed. it was like punching a puppy in the face or some shit like that."

"yeah," i sarcastically chuckle. "hurt on this side too."

"i know and that's why i wanted to apologize baby girl. but then you just kept pushing me away and really thought i fucked things." he sighed. 

"i didn't want you to turn into another dillion that's why. i'm so sick of being hurt and i didn't want you added to the list."

"i won't hurt you mia." he said to me as i laid back down on his chest. 

hopefully he keeps that promise.