Dear Friend,

November 1, 2013

Dear Friend,

     I'm sorry I haven't written to you in a couple of weeks, but I have been trying to "participate" like Ted said. It's strange because sometimes, I read a book, and I think I am the people in the book. Also, when I write Blog posts, I spend the next two days thinking about what I figured out in my entries. I do not know if this is good or bad. Nevertheless, I am trying to participate. Incidentally, the book Ted gave me was Peter Pan by Just More Barrie. I know what you're thinking. The cartoon Peter Pan with the lost boys. The actual book is so much better than that. It's just about this boy who refuses to grow up, and when Wendy grows up, he feels very betrayed. At least that's what I got out of it. I think Ted gave me the book to teach me a lesson of some kind. The good news is that I read the book, and because of its fantasy nature, I could not pretend that I was in the book. That way I could participate and still read. In terms of my participation in things, I am trying to go to social events that they set up in my school. It's too late to join any clubs or anything like that, but I still try to go to the things that I can. Things like the soccer game and dance, even if I don't have a date. 

     When I went to the soccer game I found Ben and Jenny sitting in their normal spot in the bleachers, I went down to the concession stand and bought two boxes of nachos and a pop drink for Jenny. When I returned, I sat down and gave Ben and Jenny the nachos and Jenny her pop drink. And Jenny smiled. The great thing about Jenny is that she doesn't think I'm crazy for pretending to do things. Ben doesn't either, but he was too busy watching the game and screaming at Brad, the quarterback. Jenny told me during the game tomorrow that they were going to Ben's house later for a party. Then, she asked me if I wanted to go, and I said yes because I had never been to a party before. I had seen one at my house, though.  

      My step mum always has parties and they always drink and do really immature things.  I try to leave the house when they do these kind of things.  But last time it was super cold and i had to wait for hours for it to be over.  Last year they just locked me in the dark room.  But while i was in there a boy and a girl came in and they were kissing.  But it sounded scary.  They didn't see me so they kept doing it.  I got very scared.  Even when i covered my ears i could still hear them.  so i started crying after trying so hard to stay silent.  I was crying because i thought he was hurting her because she kept telling him to stop.  when they heard me they got very mad at me and the guy called me a pervert.  

     I told Jenny and Ben about this and they both got very quiet.  

     I looked up and saw Dave our wide receiver. I watched the end of the game when Dave caught a touchdown thrown from Brad. It ended up winning the game for our school. And people went crazy in the stands because we won the game. But all I could think about was that party. I thought about it quiet for a long time, then I looked over to Jenny.  

     "He did something bad to her didn't he?"  She just nodded. I couldn't tell if she was sad or just knew more things than me. 

"We should tell someone, shouldn't we?"   Jenny just shook her head this time.  

     "Do you even know who they were, Daniel?"  

     I shook my head.

     "It was so dark in there.  I couldn't see them after they closed the door.  I only heard them."  

     The next day at the dance I felt very sad because right before i came my step mum grounded me and i sneaked out.  All I could think about was how she was going to beat me when i got home.  But i had to see my friends.  Jenny noticed how down i looked so we left the dance early.  

     Jenny and Ben walked me to Ben's house for the party that night, Bed brought his ipod for us to listen to and Jenny told Ben to find a station on the radio. And he kept getting commercials. And commercials. And a really bad song about love that had the word "baby" in it. And then more commercials. And finally he found this really amazing song about this boy, and we all got quiet. Jenny tapped her hand on her side. Ben held his hand out and made air waves as we walked. And I just listened between them. After the song finished, all my worries about my step mum went away and i felt fantastic.