Tell Her I'm Sorry

A Grand Mistake

-Sometimes we do things because we think they are the "right thing to do" but in the end they are all wrong.-

It's 3am and I can't sleep. In fact, I haven't really slept in days. Every time I close my eyes I see Emily crying, the look of devastation on her face. I hate that I'm the reason that look was in her eyes. I'm suppose to protect her from sadness yet I'm the one causing it. How messed up is that? She's my best friend, and the love of my life, yet I'm hurting her more than anyone.

It's been days since the incident in the hallway. Days since I've talked to her. It's winter break now so I haven't seen her either. I just wish I could go back in time and take back what I said. Why can't I be brave? Why the hell is it so damn hard for me to be honest about who I am? All it would take is a few simple words and I could have everything I've ever wanted. The problem is that those words will be the ones that will single handedly destroy everything I've ever known. I've never felt so helpless in my entire life.

My parents will look at me and tell me they hate me. They might even kick me out. And then there's my abuela...my aunts and uncles, my cousins...everybody will hate me. They'll disown me and tell me I'm "tearing the family apart with my sinful lifestyle".In order to get what I truly want, I'll have to lose everything I've ever had.

Whatever I choose, Emily or my life as I know it, will change everything. The question is, which one will lead me to true happiness and which one will be a grand mistake?