Sickness Of Transformation

ｌｕｐｕｓ ａｄ ｌｕｎａｍ

That left a sick feeling in Raven's stomach. Something about the way she said it. The coldness mixed in with awaiting terror. 

"What do you mean?", Raven bit her lip and awaited her response 

"Soon enough you'll get better at controlling it. You'll get used to all the sensitivity"  

"But why do I have it in the first place?" 

"Cause and effect. Cause, you got attacked by some genetically fucked up wolves. Effect, it fucks with you" 

"That doesn't make sense!" 

"Of course it wouldn't, you're a mechanic. You're no doctor" 

Raven shut her mouth, she thought of all things she really meant. Genetic mistakes can't just pass onto someone who got attacked by this genetic mistake. It just didn't work that way 

"You're sick" 

Raven kept quiet, adding what she said to another mix of ideas she had spinning around her mind. In a couple of days Clarke would dismiss her and she would be able to be busy and ignore this beast in her head. 

"What are we?" whispered Raven with an aching feeling of fear banging at her chest 

"Monsters" 

Raven felt her back give away, as her head collided with the pillow, the noise made it feel like someone was banging a drum right next to her ears. Tears ran down her cheeks, as her fists banged against the metal table next to her. 

"Fucking Softy" 

"You can't be soft once the transformation starts" 

"What" gasped Raven, she slowly got up again and wiped her tears away, "What transformation?" 

"Y'know? When the claws start comin, and the teeth stick out more?" 

"What the fuck? No I don't know" said Raven as she clutched her hands, looking at her nails and feeling her teeth 

"Ha, I guess you'll learn when the moon comes"  

The voice went silent, and Raven sat there, fearing herself. Her hands shook as she went back to repairing the walkie talkies, she could barely open the shell of it without dropping the screwdriver.

Raven's head swung, she heard footsteps behind the doors, she bit her lip as the footsteps shook her eardrums. The door swung open, and Clarke stood with a big smile spreading across her face. 

"So how are ya?" asked Clarke as she sat next to Raven 

"I'm doing good" said Raven, her hands shaking and sweat beading down her forehead.. 

Clarke sighed as she gently placed a towel onto Raven's forehead and wiped away the sweat, Raven begged that Clarke could just wipe away all of her problems, the attack, the voice and whatever the hell was gonna happen when the moon came. 

"Raven, I can't keep you in here forever. But I can't just let you out when you're hurt" said Clarke, "So please tell me what you're really feeling" 

"Honest, Clarke. I'm fine, please. Keeping me in here is just hurting camp" said Raven 

Clarke closed her eyes, "Don't make me regret this Raven" 

"Trust me, you and the rest of the camps will worship me when I start back up again" said Raven with a sly smile 

"Alright", "I'll walk you back to your tent" said Clarke 

"B-But" 

"Nope, no arguing this Raven. I'm gonna walk you to your tent, and I will be there every night to tuck you in and read you a bedtime story" said Clarke as she got up and walked towards the door, she shot Raven a big grin that warmed Raven's heart, and seemed to wipe away her fears. 

"I'll be back in around.. 20 minutes?" said Clarke before she left 

"You're too weak" 

"Hm?" mumbled Raven 

"You're developing too slow. The moon is coming soon and you're as weak as a fucking pup. I'm embarrassed." 

"I wonder why?" shot back Raven, "Oh yeah because a psycho wolf ripped my arm to shreds and now I have you in my fucking brain" 

The voice laughed, "Sure yeah. Blame me for it" 

Raven sat, her mouth shut. And waited for 20, long bitter minutes. Only to see Clarke pop back and pulled a makeshift wheelchair. 

"Look what Wick made ya" said Clarke with a smile 

"So how much did you have to pay him to make him do this?" kidded Raven as she slowly moved herself into the wheelchair

"Woah, woah. Calm down, I'll move you there" said Clarke, she quickly pushed the wheelchair closer and gently lowered Raven into it 

Raven closed her eyes and burrowed deeper into the wheelchair, as Clarke slowly pushed her out of the room, doing her best not to make any sudden noises 

Once Clarke reached her tent, and left Raven inside to settle, the voice returned. 

"Tonight the beast returns"