Lost Love (Completed)

For the Last Time

There he was sitting on his bed, smiling at me as if nothing has happened.

Stupid indeed.

He didn’t changed that much, he still looked hot on that hospital gown he was wearing, his green eyes were still twinkling the way they did when we first kissed by the river. And he still looked like the happiest person in the whole world every time he lays his eyes on me.

I sat beside him.

“You should be lying down,” I said.

He just shook his head, still smiling.

I could he smile like that? How could he be so happy knowing that he’s life was about to end anytime?!

Tears are streaming from my eyes before I could notice it. Alex slowly wiped them away, so gently as if one wrong move I would break into pieces.

Or maybe I will, because my heart ached so much I thought it would suddenly burst and turn to dust.

“You know I love you,” Alex said, he was serious.

I nodded.

Then he smiled.

I don’t get it, what’s so funny about this situation? I was about to said something when he spoke.

“That’s all that matters, I’ll die happy knowing that my first love, my only love knows that I love her,” Alex said it too naturally it made me thought for a second that we’re back by the river bank.

I still continued to cry even stronger, Alex smiled at me and hugged.

“I love you,” I said as my tears wet Alex’s hospital gown.

---

I spent the whole week taking care of Alex at the hospital. One night when I was sleeping by his bed side, Alex poked me and put his index finger against my lips.

“Ssshh,” he said in a very low voice, “we’re going somewhere.”

He pulled me and guided me towards the door.

I stopped.

“What do you think you’re doing, you can’t—,” I whispered.

“Please just this one last time,” he smiled and I wanted to cry, because he really meant it, just one last time, he wanted to go out and see the beauty of the night.

It wasn’t easy to sneak out of a hospital especially when you’re with a patient, but we managed to go out and we went straight to the river bank.

We just sat there, leaning our backs against the hard tree trunk staring at the reflection of the moon on the calm river.

Alex held my hand, his hand was very warm.

“Promise me that you’ll be happy when I’m gone,” he whispered.

I squeezed his hand tight.

I don’t want to say anything; I don’t want to promise anything. All I want is to be with him forever. And I know that that can’t be possible.

“Stay with me please,” I said, I can’t take it anymore, I can’t keep on pretending that everything would turn out great because they wouldn’t.

Alex made me looked at his eyes and wiped my tears, “I can’t take seeing you so hurt,” he said, “and I can’t forgive myself for making you cry.” He looked so sad, not because of his illness but because I’m sad.

He pulled something on his pocket, a necklace. Then he wrapped it on my neck.

“It’s a key,” he said, and when I looked at the pendant of the necklace, it’s a small golden key.

“To where?” I asked him.

“You’ll find out soon enough,” then he smiled again.

Alex rested his head on my shoulder as he held my hand so tight, as if afraid of letting go.

“I love you so much Phoebe, always remember that.”

I felt a cold touch on my cheek as Alex’s grip on my hand loosened and I already knew that he was gone forever.

I looked up at the sky silent tears falling down from my eyes.

What a perfect scenery. If only he could see it for that very last time as the first snows fell to the ground.