Chapter Eight: No

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I sighed and pulled the covers over my head. We kissed. I heard my phone buzz on the wooden beside table and the notification sound rang, signifying I had a text message. I groaned and poked my arm out from under the blankets, feeling around for my phone. My hand hit it and I quietly growled at it being cold, and picked it up, pulling my arm back under the warm duvet. I clicked it on and read the message. It was from Sam. I unlocked the phone and went into messages, reading the message, 'I need to ask you something' and there was a smiley face at the end. I shot up, letting the duvet fall off. He wanted to ask me something? Did it have something to do with the kiss? I bit my lip. "Oh, pickle!" I cursed in a whisper.

I pulled myself from bed and got dressed, going out to the kitchen for breakfast. I sat at the table and bounced my left leg rapidly under the table. Sebastian and Leo noticed my nerves but stayed quiet and didn't strike up a conversation. I chewed on my thumbnail and Leo finally broke the awkward silence in the room. "Okay, Cj. What's wrong?" He asked. I bit my lip and looked up at them.

"Nothing is wrong. I'm fine." I said. They looked at each other and exchanged a look. I stood up and walked to my room, grabbing my phone before walking outside and leaning against the car. I typed out 'clearing I lost my necklace. Now' and when I sent the message, I slipped my phone into the back pocket of my jeans. I shifted into my horse form and cantered to the clearing.

I leaned against a tree and waited for Sam. I didn't charge my phone last night and it went flat, so I couldn't ask Sam where he was or how long he'd be. He was probably in wolf form and couldn't reply anyway. I was nervous. So nervous I felt like I was going to throw up. Was he going to ask me to be his girlfriend? I mean, I know being mates is pretty much being a couple, but, I didn't know. Would I say yes?

Sam appeared and shifted back, smiling, and I pushed off the tree, walking over to him. I couldn't help it, seeing him made me smile but remembering what I had to do, made the smile slip off my lips. We met in the middle of the small clearing and he wrapped me in a hug, kissing me. Damn, he was making this too hard! I pulled back and looked down at the ground, blinking away the tears that welled in my eyes, not wanting to choke on my words because of the tightness in my throat. "Hey," he said. I looked up at him.

"Hi," I said. "What did you want to ask me?" He cupped my cheek and ran his thumb over my lips and I looked into his eyes. I wanted to read his mind and find out what he wanted to ask me but I couldn't. I never wanted to use my gifts ever again.

"Cj, you're my mate," he started. Oh god, he was going to ask me, wasn't he? "When I become Alpha of my pack, you'll be Luna. And even if I waited until I had the Alpha rank, I would still ask you, so why wait?" My heart rate quickened. "I want you to live with me, at the pack."

I looked up at him, my mouth open in a silent gasp, but I shut it and rolled my lips together, breathing out a deep breath through my nose. "Sam," his eyes searched mine, like he was reading them, trying to find my answer. Here we go. I had to do it. It was better this way. "I'm sorry. Sam, I can't." He pulled away and looked at me.

"Why not? Is it Leo and Sebastian? They can stay too. I know they're like family to you, so they're welcome to live at the pack house with us." He said, his voice becoming weaker with my rejection. It was only a rejection to living with him, but a rejection nonetheless.

I shook my head. "Sam, listen, I can't. It... It is better that I don't come anywhere near your pack. I bring danger. If they find me, they'll stop at nothing to get me. Please, just understand that I can't put you or the pack in danger." My heart leaped, almost up my throat and out of my mouth. I didn't think it would make him upset like this; his eyes were glazed with tears. I felt the tears coming to my own eyes again and I knew I was going to break his heart more than it broke mine. Mates were important to werewolves, as they were for every shifter species, but most werewolf mates were so close. And they also had a blood bond, connecting the mates on a deeper level. They were pretty much linked afterwards. It was cute, but horrible when you lost your mate. You go from sharing feelings and thoughts - good and bad - to feeling absolutely nothing, like the line going dead on a phone call.

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