The numbers never lie

Chapter 2

I was being hauled away from dream world as I acknowledged the reality of the soft carpet Beneath me.
What the fuck? Was I on the floor? How d-
Wait wait... Pancakes? Pancakes!

Bolting upright, I became aware of the intrusive headache invading my cranium.
I craddled my head in my hands, wincing as I stood up.
What the fuck happened last nig-? Ohhh. I observed my surroundings, recalling passing out in front of Gerards bedroom door.
I promised myself I wasn't going to drink again! I hated it when I gave into the craving.

I especially hated it when Gerard found me drunk, which I vaguely remember, narrowly missing his leather boots with my puke.
Of course he pretends it's fine but I know it isn't. We've been friends for over fifteen years, I should know better! I would usually stay somewhere else if I was completely hammered, but being the stubborn asshole I am, I thought I could handle it.

While I was preoccupied with cursing at myself for being an idiot, I perceived the blanket that was laid on top of me.
I smiled to myself
I don't deserve a friend like Gerard.

I began to hobble my way toward the intoxicating smell of delicious pancakes, shaking the detrimental thoughts.
As I entered the kitchen I detected unruly, greasy hair and instantly ran forward wrapping my arms around his stomach.

"Well good morning." Gerard said as he poured pancake batter into a pan.
"I'm sorry." I apologized, pulling away and gazing into his hazel eyes which lost their shine at the mention of last night.

"It's okay." He mumbled, returning back to the stove and allowing his hair to fall into his eyes. I knew he hated this topic and I hated discussing it with him.

"I know this isn't what you expected when we decided to become roommates." I started, getting straight to the point. I never use to drink, but when Gerard and I had drifted apart no one was there to stop me.
"Frankie, it's fine, really. I've been there..."
He tried but I wasn't buying any of it.
"Exactly! You don't deserve to be reminded of that stage in your life. I wanna try and fix this ok." I said placing my hand on his shoulder.

He then turned to me, eyes glassy. This was new, Gerard never cried. Especially when we discussed his alcoholism. He usually just got angry.
"I just want you to get better, Frankie." He said pulling me in for a hug.
I hugged back, pulling him in closer
"Your my best friend, your like a brother to me and I don't want to see you take the same path I did." He whispered. "It just reminds me of the past."

I then registered why he was getting so emotional.

Tomorrow was September tenth.

How can I be so dumb! I'm such an idiot! Being so caught up with school and going on dates I haven't been keeping track of the day.
I pulled back, noticing the stray tear creeping down his cheek, feeling my heart shatter in my chest.

"What do you want to do tomorrow?" I asked him as I felt my own emotions get the best of me, tears ready to cascade down my face.
He then wrapped his arms around my shoulders and buried his face into the crook of my neck, sobbing silently. I rubbed his back in a circular motion as i felt my own tears run down to my chin.

"I-I wanna go to h-his grave." Gerard stuttered. This took me by surprise. He hadn't been to his grave in three years.
"Are you sure?" I asked looking into his eyes.
He nodded his head. "I-I also wanna go to his favorite comic book store." He stated going back to his previous position.

I didn't know what to say so I just continued to hold him, reassuring him I was there.
We usually only got him a cake and ate it while watching Mikey's favorite movies.
I think Gerard was finally acknowledging that he wasn't coming back.

He then quickly wiped his face and return to his, now burnt, pancakes.
"There almost done," he stated "pour us some coffee?" He said composing himself and quickly changing the subject.

"Sure" I said, obtaining two mugs from the cabinet and heading over to the coffee maker.