I was standing on the edge of a cliff, looking out at an ocean below. Everything was kind of faded, and even the sky was white.
“Hey Fallie-valley,” the voice chimed, it sounded like my mother. I knew that nickname from anywhere, especially from that voice. I turned, with a wide eyed expression. “Mom,” I whispered. She stood there in a long white dress, looking more ethereal than ever. “Mom!” I shouted, running over to her, but sadly I ran right through her.
I turned, and she was still there. “Mom,”
“Sorry, hun.”
“Anyways, mom—I miss you. How yah been up there?”
“Good, great. I’ve been watching you Fallon, seems you got something going on with that Alistair kid, eh?”
I blush inevitably. “No, we’re just eh…uh, friends.”
“Anyways, Fallon, why did you uh…let yourself…go?”
I chuckle softly. “Mom, what do you mean?”
She crosses her arms across her chest, and gives me the look. “What?”
“Look at yourself,” she examples her hand, and a mirror manifests out of thin air.
I give my face a once over, and I realize how terrible I looked. My eyes were sunken in dark plum pits, my skin ridden with acne, my skin sallow, and my body overall lanky and skinny. My hair was growing past my bra, and was in dire need of a cut—and in that moment I realized how I let myself go. The only thing that was remotely—pretty about me were my greenish hazel eyes.
I clenched my hands in my pajama pants. Never have I really –looked at myself. For a while I just didn’t care, and I just let life go on, but now for some reason, somewhere in the put of my stomach I cared. And I realized I looked like a mad women. No wonder people avoided me—I was a walking freak show.
And the only friend I had, had the perfect life. She had the boyfriend, the looks, the family, the other friends—besides me; wait Fallon, don’t forget—you’re the best friend. Still though, everything I didn’t have she did, but yet she still hung around a sad loser like me.
Hot tears pricked in the corners of my eyes.
Why would Alistair even take interest in such a vulgar looking person as myself? It was bad enough that I looked the way I looked—but the way I treated Alistair. He was so patient with me. He was nice to me. And I rejected him, even though I was probably the ugliest thing he’s ever laid eyes on.
No Fallon, he probably thinks you’re easy. Somewhere in my brain warned.
Easy…how easy it was to let myself fall apart and come to this…
I crumpled down in a heap, and sobbed.
“How?—How did I let this happen to me?”
“Fallon, don’t let me hold you back—you’re beautiful underneath all that pain and suffering. Don’t hold back, be who you truly are…who you used to be…” I looked up, and realized she was dissolving before my eyes.
“Mom, wait, no!” I reached out to her, and fell into nothingness, and everything around me shrouded in black. And I become weightless, as I plummeted, my stomach jumped to my chest.
Then I bolted awake, and grabbed my cell phone. Before I even knew it I was dialing Jenna’s number.
“Hello—,”
“Jenna, pick me up now!”
“Fallon—? Fallon what’s wrong?”
“Just come get me!”
She hung up wordlessly, and I racked my fingers through my hair, and licked my drying lips. If she was my best friend—she’d come, and I’d wait. I ran to the bathroom and hastily took care of hygiene .
I ran up to my dad’s room, slamming the door open and flipping on the lights.
My dad jumps up in the bed, startled and confused. “Fallon, what the hell!”
“Give me your credit card, now!” I roared at him, walking over to his side of the bed. “Fallon—what, what are you talking about?”
“Look at me!” I shouted, exampling to my body. “Look at what you let me become, I’m terrible looking. I’m a walking monster! You let me become this! Why didn’t you fall apart? Huh, you didn’t care? You never cared! I know you didn’t care—hell, you moved on! Got a girlfriend, never cared! You just let me fall apart—did you ever even ask if I was okay! You just moved on all alone—”
“Fallon, that’s—”
“Shut up when I’m talking you fat fuck!”
His eyes widened. “Listen here young lady, I don’t want to—“
I spotted his wallet on his nightstand, darted for it, and took it. “I’m moving on too dad, have a nice life.” I said quickly taking out his credit card, and running out of the room. My dad was fast behind me, he grabbed my left arm, trying to stop me as I reached the front door.
I took my leg up, and kicked it back into his groin.
He winced, and crumpled onto the ground. I turned, looking at him while grabbing the house keys off the rack. “I’ll be back on Saturday, just…don’t call me, okay?” I breathed, opening the door, and running out of it.
Jenna’s car pulled up in the driveway, and I hopped into the passenger seat.
“Fallon!” my dad shouted out the front door.
“Just drive!” I commanded Jenna, she gave me a startled looked, and hastily backed out—managing to knock over trash can.
“Where are we going?”
“Anywhere—anywhere besides here, I need…I need to go shopping. I need to be…beautiful. I want to beautiful. I’m ugly. Jenna, make me over!”
Jenna smiled, and clenched her hands on the wheel. She let out a howl. “I waited for this day to come! Fallon, I will make you look beautiful!”
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A/N: Just wanted to say, thankies to people following my story, and reading! It means a lot, so don't forget to comment, vote, and fan! <3
~Beautifully Awkward
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Temptation
RomanceI can honestly say he was my biggest temptation, he was constantly dragging me into these situations that seven months ago I couldn't see myself in. He was too much, and at the same time not enough. I felt like I was drowning, and this was a suicide...
