What's Left of Me (Jacob Black Fan Fiction)

Chapter 27 - Life Alone

      Nothing was the same. I looked around my old room as I sat on my bed. I refused to unpack my suitcases that now were open on the floor. It's been that way since we got back a week ago. As I sat, only bad memories came. I hadn't talked to my parents since getting on the plane. Since they took me away from everything. They tried to convince me of how great it was to be home but I just felt numb. This wasn't where I belonged, not anymore. I felt completely empty and alone. I had no idea when I would be able to go back to La Push. I'd turn eighteen in a few months but I don't know if I could make it that long.

      I could only imagine how everyone else felt. Paul probably was blaming himself for my parents' actions. It wasn't his fault. The pack had become like a family to me. They had been there through one of the hardest times of my life. They could make me laugh, calm me down, and give me advice. Then there was Jacob. Just thinking his name made my heart clench in pain. When I closed my eyes, his smiling face was all I could see. I hated that he was hurting because of me. I wanted to comfort him and assure him I'll return. I want to have him hold me and tell me he loves me. He was most likely torn apart and feeling just as lonely as I felt. Everything was cold here. I didn't have his warmth.

      I didn't try to go out. My parents tried to get me to go out with my old friends but I refused. I didn't know them anymore. They've changed as have I. I didn't dress up. My outfit consisted of sweatpants and t-shirts. I put minimum make-up on. My mom would tell me to change my clothes and make an effort but I didn't see the point. She didn't get it. No one did. I didn't care about this place, these people because my life was somewhere else. I'm a different person and they moved on without me. And I was ok with that.

      I put my headphones in my ears and turned my music up loud. I laid back on my bed and looked up at the ceiling. How depressing am I, I thought with a sigh. I close my eyes to try to relax but was interrupted by my dad. I pressed pause on my ipod as he came to a stop by the bed. "Our friends are coming over tonight with their son. They'll be with us for dinner so you're mother would like you to dress nicely please," he stated looking at me. I remained silent and staring at the ceiling, not giving him a response. I didn't need my parents trying to set me up with another guy. I had a guy or at least I hope I still did.

XX LATER XX

      Here I was sitting at the dinner table with our guests whose names I couldn't even remember. I did dress nicer then my usual but not by much. I had come down before supper in skinny jeans and a tighter tshirt but that's all that changed. My parents didn't say anything about it. They were talking about some nonsense with their friends while their son tried to talk to me. "So Danielle are you happy to be back?' he asked. What was his name? I thought to myself. "Not really," I replied boredly. "Well then I bet you like not having to deal with Aaron anymore," he continued obviously not taking the hint that I didn't want to speak to him. "Yeah I suppose," I respond sipping my water. I could've cared less if I was being a bitch to this boy. I mean he was cute with shaggy blonde hair and green eyes but they were dull compared to the bright brown ones I came to love and was much whiter then the pack.

      He looked at me for a little bit without saying anything. To be honest, it was becoming annoying fast. "Will you stop staring at me?" I snapped at him louder then I thought. Everyone stopped and glanced at me. "Danielle..." my mom began. Her eyes looked like they were about to bug out of her head while my dad looked furious. "May I be excused?" I ask but don't wait for permission as I leave the table. As I climb the stairs to my room, I could hear my mother's frantic voice. "I'm so sorry Brandon. She usually doesn't act that way," she rambles. I don't hear if anyone responds before I close my bedroom door. Shortly after I had escaped the dinner table, I heard our guests leaving and then my parents making their wya up the stairs. I sat up and prepared myself for yelling from the both of them just like I had for the past week.

      They didn't knock. They just stormed right in stopping in front of where I sat. I slowly took out my headphones and looked between the two. "What do you think you're doing young lady?" my dad asks crossing his arms over his chest. I look around before replying. "Sitting in my room, " I say sarcastically. "Dont' use that tone with us Dani. You were very rude to Brandon. He's a nice boy," my mom exclaimed putting her hands on her hips. She always did this to make sure I knew she was upset. "He was staring at me and I don't care if he's nice or not," I reply sitting up straighter ready to defend myself. "You need to get over this depressive state you're in," my dad states.

      I narrow my eyes at him. "It's your faults I'm this way. If you would've let me stay in La Push, then I would be happy," I exclaim standing up and clenching m fists by my sides. "Are you still talking about that reservation? Sweetie, you weren't even there a long time," my mom trys to reason, brushing off my comment. "I was there long enough. I want to be there, not here," I tell them, hearing my voice rise. "Your friends, family, and life are here Danielle," my dad yells stepping closer. My anger was about to boil over. "This isn't my life anymore!" I yell back. My parents stare at me stunned with my outburst. I haven't ever really yelled at my parents before. Obviously we've had our fights but not to where we were both yelling. I stare back at them, unclenching my fists as my body relaxes. "Listen, I'm sorry--," I begin but am cut off by my mom. She looks up at my dad and I can see that both of their faces had soften. "It seems we have a lot to discuss," she calmly says closing my bedroom door. I sit back down ready for anything.