Lost But Not Forgotten (NaNoWriMo 2013)

19.

19.

I couldn’t believe it, the person I could trust, the person that I loved had been lying to me since the start. He was an enemy. I was so angry my blood boiled to one hundred degrees, how could he?

“Wh- what?!” I splutter out. I push him at the chest as hard as I can and he goes stumbling back. All the commotion was making everyone glance at us.

“April-“he tries to say but I completely cut him off.

“How could you lie!” I stand up, my fists balled. I thought I could trust him, I thought he was the one and all this time... he was a robot! It’s his fault the town got blown up! Tears of madness stream down my face and it seems like steam is seeping out my ears. He had been spying on us, his love for me isn’t real, it isn’t real!

“Please, let me explain, I-“

“Let you explain?! Oh I think I know enough you traitor! I thought you loved me!” I was crying buckets now, we both were standing up now just inches away from each other. The anger overpowers me and I punched him straight in the face but he doesn’t flinch. Cameron looks at me with sympathy but this only makes me angrier. I punch him again. And again. By now everyone was watching, wandering what the hell I was shouting about.

“I do love you...” his voice is so sweet and so alluring that my heart wants to forgive him immediately and go back to what life was like before but my mind was smart, too smart for him.

“Yeah right! You were spying on us! It’s your fault that everyone I know is dead! It’s all your fault you idiot!” I screech so loudly it feels like the ground is shaking form my voice.

“I was spying but then, I fell in love and I stopped. I swear that is all it is” he tries to step forward and comfort me but I know better than to trust this pest. He’s deceived me once but he’s not going to do it again. “April, I know I lied to you but I promise I’m not lying now when I say that I love you. I’m on your side now, not the robots...” he places a hand on my shoulder but I angrily shove it away. I’m not going to let him sympathise with me.

I kick him as hard as I can and he loses his balance, stumbling to the ground. “Don’t you touch me you creep! All this time... it was all a lie... just to get closer to me... I thought that you, you were the one but I guess I was wrong. Just leave me alone and never come back!” It all came out without a thought, Cameron suddenly looks so hurt but I mean those words and I am not taking them back. Violently tearing off the necklace, I throw it straight at the robot, aiming for his head but it lands right in front of him, covered in dirt. I stomp the ground with my boot and race off into the distance making sure not to look back, I didn’t care where I went, I just wanted to get away from everyone, away from the heartbreak.

I keep running for what seems like hours in the darkness, passing so many trees I forget that they even are there. My legs just keep on going and going until I can run no more. Tree branches slice through my face and I can feel the cuts everywhere slowly dripping blood but I don’t care, I don’t care about anything anymore. All of a sudden, my right foot gets caught on something and I tumble onto the ground but I don’t stop, I keep rolling down what seems like a hill; The pain around my body gets more intense as the snow just covers me while I roll an droll endlessly until I come to a sudden stop.

I don’t have the energy to do anything, to move, to open my eyes so I just lie there. I don’t want to have to face reality. I just want to go back to what my life used to be like, when I didn’t know who Cameron really was, when we were in love. I still have really strong feelings for him but I push them away, hoping to never have to experience love like that ever again. It all eventually ends in heart break anyway.

The owls around me toot but other than that, the world around me is silent. Everything is so peaceful like I have always wanted it to be. I think I might have broken or fractured a few bones, I’m not sure where though but I realy don’t care.

I try and relax but the pain just gets worse and worse until every single bit of my body is in complete agony. I struggle to stay quiet but it is so bad I have to moan. I try to force myself to stop but it doesn’t work, I don’t want anyone to find me. I hope no one had followed me, I don’t want to deal with anything anymore, I don’t want to live anymore, and there is no point.

For the rest of the night, my mind slips in an out of consciousness for a few hours, I hallucinate the grim reaper lurking in the shadows but common sense tells me that it all isn’t real. I eventually fall asleep and my body drops into darkness but unconsciousness doesn’t help, I am still plagued with terrifying dreams about Cameron. I hope he is long gone, away from my family. I hope he is dead, I hope that he feels guilty, I hope that his head gets ripped off from his body and eaten by flies... I hope...

yay! I'm almost at 20,000 words!!!!!! I am wondering what shoudl happen next... Hmmm....