Emily's Diary of Dreams (Wattys 2016)

One Rainy Day - Part 3

"Lina"

"Thomas!!"

Thomas? Who is Thomas?

Lina went straight to Warren and hug him. I am shocked and look at the odd couple on the spot. What makes it better is that she kiss him right here and there. Ok. Hold up. I never see her before in five years we met and this woman is clearly someone who is important in his life with all of that hoggling. Why exist now?

"Lina. I want you to meet my neighbour, Emily." Warren gesture me while holding Lina's waist.

"Hi Emily. Lina, Thomas fiance. Nice to meet you."Lina take out her hand.

I take it and shook. But during that time, I can feel my world ended. Warren has a fiance. It seems that the man I know for these five years never existed in the first place.

"I'm sorry. Thomas? You have another name Warren? Hahaha."

What a fake laugh.

"oohh... you call Thomas as Warren is it?" Lina intervenes.

"My name is Thomas Warren. My friends call me Warren. Only she like to call me Thomas." Warren smiles and look at Lina. That is a loving look he has for her.

Crack. I can feel my heart breaking.

"Well, let's go in. I got gifts from UK. Emily, you can join us if you want too." Lina said to me with a smile.

Crack. Two crack to go.

"Oooh... I forgot something important from my workplace. I need to go back. You guys go ahead."

"Are you sure?" Warren ask with full of concern.

"Yes. You should go. You haven't meet her for a while."

Crack. One crack to go.

Then, I walked. One step with one step at a time. It feels empty with him not by my side as I walk back to the Ritz. Its not me. This is the first time I felt pure loneliness.

Then, someone tug my arm and I almost scream my lungs out. As this stranger tugs me to face him, my eye went big. It's Warren.

"You freaking scared me just now you look like you almost gonna kidnap me, man."

"Sorry Emily. Didn't mean to scare ya."

"I felt my life span shortened for 10 years for that. You owe me big for doing this. What's up? Aren't you suppose to be with Lina?"

"I want to accompany you back. That is the least I could do since you are very surprise to see Lina."

"Of course I am you dimwit. You never told me about her."

"I kinda like that. I mean. I dunno. I kinda like having problems with her for the marriage. Problems with my future father-in-law. He is from military. It is really hard to impress him. Lina is his only daughter."

Then, I felt a ray of hope. Wait, why should I feel that. I mean come on, he already has someone. Which is Lina of course. Why should I feel relieved when Warren suppose to have problems while I should be super concern for my close friend problem.

Friend huh. That is weird way of saying it.

"Emily.. hey Emily.. Are you there?"

"What? You were saying?"

"Even with all of that problem in my upcoming marriage, one thing for sure which I know very well is that I cannot live without her. If she left me, I will die."

Crack.

"Then, you should go to her right now. Not be here with me."

"Are you sure Emily?"

Crack.

"Yup." No. I was just kidding. Don't go. Stay and love me.

"Are you really sure?"

Crack. Crack.

"Yes Warren. I am positive." No.. why do you exist now.

I smile towards Warren. Hopeful smile to just let him know that I am fine. While on the inside,I am on the verge of breaking down. Knowing my heart breaking bit by bit.

"Well. I should go back. Here you go. An umbrella. You always forget them. I had an inkling that it is going to rain. Alright then, see you soon. Be careful alright."

"I will."

Then, off he goes.

I am walking back. Tap. Tap. Tap.

The rain comes and greet me. I see his umbrella and I feel my heart breaking. I just walk without using it.

Under the rain. Tap. Tap. Tap.

I felt hopeless. My heart, mind and soul can feel that I am going to lose him. I know I already lose him.

Looking towards the sky. Tap. Tap. Tap.

I look at my side.

He's gone. Away from me. To her. His fiancé.

Then I found a bench. I sit on it and cry. My tears flow as the rain travels to my body. The rain feels how I feel. This rainy day made me realise that once more it happen again.

Little did I know. I am falling madly to him. The only one that I cannot have. Warren.

For the first time in the rain, I broke down and cry on the street.