The Cecil Hotel

Chapter 9: Pirates and lumberjacks

"So, tell me fellow crackheads, what was it like in downtown LA?" Asked Clifford, scarfing down 178 cheeseburgers.

"We were just there, idiot!" Yelled Gil after he slurped down 2 glasses of wine.

Mike noticed a little kid who was naked, playing with an ax. He asked what the hell a little kid was doing with that thing and why he was naked.

"Oh, that's Odin. He's playing pirates and lumberjacks. Ignore him," said Philip.

"But why the hell is he naked using an AX?!" Yelled Mike horrendously.

Philip shrugged. "Cuz that's how the game works, idiot. He's supposed to be naked because it's supposed to take place in the dark ages back when the ol'lumberjacks were a-workin."

"I see," said Mike awkwardly shaking his ass.

"Yeah boi lemme see you shake dat ass," said Clifford, getting all excited.

"Aw shut the fucking fuck up you stupid fucking duncehole of a fucking fatass wimp," said Mike.

"Now don't you start cursing at them or else you'll get your ass busted you sunuva gun!" said Gil.

"Aw shut up you stupid piece of crap," Mike screamed at the top of his lungs.

Odin, who was now standing and watching, interfered.

"Yay! The pirate killed its butt!" He yelled.

"What the hell are you talking about?" said Gil, shaking with confusion.

"I pointed the ax at the pirate's ass and hit it!" Odin yelled jumping up and down.

"Dude do you realize what language your 3-year-old kid has picked up?" Gil said turning to Philip while snarling and snorting like a dog as he ate a papaya and spit out its seeds as they tumbled into Odin's mouth.

"It's daddy sonny talk. We have it all the time," said Philip, gnarling.

"Excuse me? You mean using fowl language is how you talk to your son? Well I'm sorry but I think I might leave this ship and dress up as an overweight Mexican cop to earn some REAL money," said Mike, budding in. "Instead of teaching your son crackhead talk, maybe you should get yourself a beer and think about money."

"Too late. My son has already learned the whole curse word vocabulary," said Philip, proudly.

"Yup!" Odin yelled jumping up and down while yelling every curse word you could imagine. Gil and Mike immediately started arguing in German.

(To be continued)