puppy dog eyes - joshler

.1

I'm obsessed with Josh Dun.

Not in a creepy way, more in a 'you are absolutely the most beautiful person alive' kinda way.

It all started, back in junior high. I was thirteen, he was fourteen. We were best friends, I liked him, I loved him. I didn't want to tell him, because that would be awkward, since we hung out almost every day. Until something awful happened. Josh's mom and dad died in a car accident. I know that sounds cliché, like this is some tragic love story. Sadly, there was no love. And he blamed me for it.

Me. Out of all people, he said it was me. But what thirteen year old me didn't know is that, it kinda was. He was at my house, instead of in the car, with his parents, going to the store. It was my fault, it is my fault. He said that he rather have died with them, but that would have messed me up so bad.

We'er in high school now, we kinda drifted apart. He's more into the whole 'band family' and I'm more 'dramatic seventeen year old, who doesn't know how to do theatre arts.' I know, it's an easy class. But to sing in front of everyone? No thanks.

Josh has met some badass people through the years. Some people I dream to be like. Pete, Patrick. These two biker dudes, Gerard and Mikey. A super cool art kid, Frank. A guy named Brendon, who can sing so good. Josh, is kinda the popular kid at our school, just no one says it. Everyone knows he's cool, and so are his friends. Everyone knows he's smart, and has a lot of talent. Everyone knows how gorgeous he is. Everyone knows--about his parents.

Nobody talks about it much. Back it the 8th grade, when it happened, everyone was talking about it, and he knew too. It's heart breaking, because I still see that broken little fourteen year old, every time I pass him in the hallway. I want to be his friend, but he won't let me.

~

"Hey, Einstein."

I was in deep thought. About Josh, of course.

"Earth to Tyler!" I heard Melanie's voice get louder.

"Y-yeah, yeah." I said, blinking fast, leaning back.

"Lunch is over, wanna come to my locker?"

"Oh, um, yeah, sure."

We walked through crowds of people, trying to get to her locker.

"I only need to get a few things, and oh! I have a surprise for you!" She opened her locker, grabbing her books, her camera, along with a Polaroid picture.

"Here ya go." She handed it to me.

At first, I was shocked, then I was embarrassed. It was Josh, his blue hair shining, he was smiling, but not looking at the camera. The sun was peeking it's way over his head. The sky behind him was pink, blue-ish, purple. It was beautiful.

"Keep it."

"No, no, Mel. This is so wonderful! You keep it!" I tired handing it back, she pushed my hand back.

"I know you--" she cleared her throat. "I thought you'd like the colors, and the amount of Tumblr. Plus, I don't want a picture of him, you know I like Ashley." She spoke softly, so no one could hear us. "And... It's your birthday next week."

I smiled and looked at the picture. "Thanks, Mel. You're, like, the best ever."

She giggled.

The bell rang, "Bye, Ty, see you in theatre." She closed her locked and walked away.

~

Fifth period, I see Josh, Pete, Pat, Ashley, Gerard, Frank, and Brendon, or 'beebo' is what Josh calls him. There's a few other kids, Troye and Ryan, that's who Ashley hangs out with the most. They're super sweet, and attractive, they probably have more talent is their pinkie than I do in my whole entire body.

"Okay, class. Tonight I want you to reads pages, 165 through 178."

Everyone sighed, history isn't really my thing. Josh loves it. Him and his friends get together on the weekends, sometimes even school nights to study. Mostly him helping. I know he loves band even more.

He can play the trumpet so good. God, I wish Mel would get a picture of that. He's also good at playing the drums, like, hella good. Me and him used to talk about getting a band together but, you can't have just two people in a band, that's silly.

I study the room, mostly Josh, since he sits right in front of me. Pete and Pat sit to his left, Pete sitting by Josh and Pat sitting by me. Ash and her 'squad' sit in the back. I can always hear them giggling, and the teacher always shushes them.

Gerard and Frank sit with each other a lot, sometimes they get a little too close.

Brendon sits on the right of Josh... I'm stuck in the middle of all this. I don't have any friends in this class, honestly.

"If you guys want, you can get with someone in the room and get a head start." The teacher announced.

Shit.