14
One week
Gee
Frank grabbed my hand and we walked up to the building.
"I'm not going in." He stated.
"Okay you don't have to." I said going to hug him.
"Don't not right now I'm hungry and I don't want to hurt you." He said pushing me away.
"Okay don't starve yourself Frankie." I said and he kissed my hand.
"I won't dear." He said walking back to the truck.
I opened the door and walked up to the desk. Jessy looked up and gave me the look of death. I tried my hardest not to cry and it didn't work.
"Gerard calm down it will be gone soon." She said.
I sat down and then the doctor came out and motioned me to follow. I did and he took me to a room and helped me unpack my things.
"Gerard what's this?" He asked holding up the pacifier.
"It's my friends daughters. Can I keep it with me I won't be able to see her for a while and she means a lot to me; she's like my daughter." I said grabbing it.
"I guess." He said grabbing my phone and DS.
I only took them because I don't want Frankie to see the text between me and Pete. I laid down for a minute and fell asleep. I was shook awake by Jessy and she took me to the therapist I was supposed to be seeing for the next few months.
"So it's Gerard right?" He smiled shaking my hand.
"Yeah, it's been a couple months since I've been here." I laughed looking around.
"That's not a good thing." He said crossing his legs.
"Don't cross your legs I feel like you're not paying attention." I said fidgeting with my shirt.
"Sorry." He mumbled uncrossing his legs.
"When did this all start?" He asked.
"You know it says it in my file." I said pulling my knees up to my chest.
"I know but do you remember." He said leaning forward.
/back\
It was the day my grandma died. I remember everything so vividly. It was a month after Frank moved. I was thirteen at the time.
"Gerard something happened to your grandmother and she didn't make it." My mom said coming into my room.
I grabbed my hair and pulled tears threatening to fall. It hurt worse than anything I felt. It hurt worse than Frank, it hurt worse than the names, it hurt worse than the bruises. I started hyperventilating and I was rushed to the hospital. This was my first panic-attack. I went home the next day and some of the popular kids invited me over at first I said no but they told me they would tell the whole school I was gay.
"Okay I'm coming." I said
I walked to the address and they greeted me at the door. I walked in a smile on my face and they shoved me down the stairs into the basement.
"Here light this." Jade said shoving it in my face.
"I'm not supposed to." I whimpered.
"Come on it's just one." She said.
And again peer pressure won, then it was a downward spiral. Four years later Frank came back then left a couple months later. A year later was back at it. Anything you could think of I was most likely on.
