I Think I Always Will

Star Lighting

In my town there is a giant glowing star perched atop a great rock. Every year on November 23rd this star lit up to kick off the beginning of holiday season. It is a night when everyone in the town crowds the old downtown streets and waits eagerly for the countdown. Lights are strung and there's booths with cookies, candy canes, hot chocolate, and more set up all over. Carolers stand in groups, singing cheery songs of Christmas as people stand to watch and listen. Children chase each other with light up wands as the adults mingle and laugh loudly. When the countdown hits one, the star is lit and fireworks explode into the sky behind it. Families and friends keep bundled together in the cold while oohs and ahhs are heard all around. It is something that nearly everyone looks forward to all year-especially me.

After happily watching the Doctor Who 50th Anniversary Special on BBC, I hopped in the shower and began getting ready for the fun night ahead. I applied some winged eyeliner and mascara as I usually do and threw on some light eye shadow for the heck of it. I wore black leggings with maroon knee high socks and a simple white lace shirt then threw on my favorite maroon polka dot sweater with elbow patches. My hair is already curly but with it being as frizzy as it is, I often curl a few pieces here and there, including my bangs, to tame it. After putting on chap stick and my low brown boots that I thrifted over the summer, I hopped in the car with my mother and stepfather and we headed out to pick up Lizzie.

When we arrived in town it was about 4:25pm and extremely hard to find a parking spot. At one point we came to a dead stop and Lizzie and I decided to jump out and begin walking towards the festivities. We decided to head to one of our favorite coffee shops to get hot chocolate and warm up as it was only about 32 degrees. As we walked there, I kept my eye open for Josh, knowing he would be here since he mentioned he was coming with his family and Brad. I really wanted to find him before the countdown.

After waiting in line and getting hot chocolate, it was only 4:50 and we still had 40 minutes to spare until the countdown. We walk through the streets multiple times, seeing familiar faces but never the one I wanted to see. Eventually I came across my good friend Jenna and spoke to her for a bit.

"Have you seen Josh yet?" she asked.

"No, I've been looking for him though. Why, have you?" I asked eagerly.

"Yeah I saw him just a little bit ago, he was walking that way," she said casually.

"WHAT? Are you serious? I've been looking for him all night. Ugh," I exclaimed frustrated. I grabbed Lizzie's arm and dragged her away, determination on my face. We looked around but soon heard the crowd counting down and ran to a good place to see the star.

I sighed but smiled slightly when everyone cheered at the last number of the countdown. The fireworks began and we watched for a few minutes but eventually left, getting bored with the 30 minute light show. We headed back to the same coffee shop and I got a strawberry smoothie despite the temperature. Lizzie got a chai latte we sat down and spoke for a little bit.

After about ten minutes we headed back outside and saw that the amount of people crowding the streets had already died down. I looked to my left when I saw a familiar face and smiled widely.

"I think I found Josh," I told Lizzie as I walked quickly towards him.

He was speaking with someone on his sisters phone but he smiled and put his arm around me in a half hug. I said hi to Brad and so did Lizzie and we waited for Josh to get off the phone. After a little bit he hung up and started talking to us. We headed back into the cafe for the third time that night and stood around talking for a while. Josh and Brad's friend Caleb joined us and told us some really funny stories of experiences at his school. Josh stood to my left while Lizzie was to my right and often times his arm would brush against mine. I was still drinking my smoothie when he asked if he could try it. I handed it to him and he took it eagerly but didn't give it back after a while. I tried to reach for it but him being seven inches taller than me, that didn't work out too well. I retracted my arms and let him have it realizing there was nothing I could do. He laughed and nudged me saying thanks and I rolled my eyes but laughed as well.

The cafe was still pretty full so we decided to move back to a corner of the lounge when a large group left. We messed around and told jokes and I met Josh's younger sister whom which is very sweet. Time went quickly at about 6:20, they unfortunately all had to leave.

"Aw man we have to go," Josh said disappointedly.

"It's alright, I'll see you on Monday. You can message me on Facebook too obviously," I poked his arm.

"Alright. Well it was nice seeing you," he smiled.

He stretched out his arms, inviting me to hug him and I happily obliged. He wrapped his arms around me and I did the same, enjoying his embrace and the smell of his cologne. I couldn't wipe the smile off my face when he walked away.

My parents were with a huge group of friends at a restaurant still but my mother dropped Lizzie and I off at our house. It was only about 7 so we had a lot of time to do stuff and the house to ourselves. But with us being the lame high schoolers that we are, we simply stuffed our faces with cookies and mac and cheese while watching Awkward on MTV.

At around 11:00 Josh messaged me on Facebook. We spoke for a while and I began to tell him about certain people that bothered me and were mean. This is how to conversation went after I told him:

Josh: But (my name), you're great and fun to be around and one of my main homies. Don't let some jerk like that get you down.

Me: Eh

Josh: Don't eh me.

Me: I'm sorry.

Josh: You best be.

But seriously.

Me: This is why I get frustrated with myself sometimes.

Josh: Why? Because other people cause problems?

Me: Because I'm dumb.

Josh: No you're not.

Me: Okay not literally unintelligent.

Josh: You're great.

Me: I just overthink everything.

And I can't accept compliments.

Josh: Well I'm going to make you accept them.

Me: What do you mean?

Josh: I'll have to teach you.

Me: Teach me?

Josh: Yes. I will teach you how to accept compliments.

Me: Okay...

Josh: (My name), you're amazing.

Me: Nah...

Josh: Yes you are.

Me: lehevvabsjdkslsppwjebsnslbsywoaj

Josh: Now you say "thank you".

Me: Thank you....

Josh: That's my girl.

*later*

Josh: Goodnight

Stay beautiful

Katniss

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