A Letter Before I Go ; malum

10

Michael was in a sour mood. He sat on his phone with a frown on his face in the dressing room, listening to his friends flirt. More specifically, Calum and Ashton. Michael wished he was oblivious as to why he was so annoyed, but he wasn't.

He knew he was jealous.

It didn't take a genius to know that Michael had a crush. It didn't take a genius to know that he was trying hard to deny it.

Calum sat down and put his feet on the guy's lap, still topless and annoyingly hot as he laid down. He kicked Michael in the stomach lightly to get his attention, not understanding why he was being so moody.

"Hey, you okay?"

Michael smiled, and Calum tried hard to ignore the stupid butterflies that were trapped in his stomach. "Yeah, I'm okay. Just tired."

Calum sat up, frowning slightly. "Have you been taking your pills?"

The purple-haired boy didn't miss the way Calum's eyes were filled with sadness. He knew Calum felt sad about him having depression. "Yes, Calum, I have. Stop worrying."

"I'm not." The Maori sighed, leaning his forehead on Michael's shoulder. "Let's go meet fans."

They went out the back, security trailing behind them, close to the walls of the venue. The boys craned their heads out of the fence so they could take selfies with the fans. Calum kept his eyes on Michael most of the time, watching him talk to fans.

"Ataahua." He said before he could stop it, and then blushed, seeing a few people filming.

"What does that mean?" somebody said.

"Nothing," the Maori dismissed it quickly, looking away, "so, how are you guys?"

"We're good, how're you?"

"I'm okay. Pretty tired. Mid-tour feels." Calum said, shrugging.

"I love you." one of the fans called, budging their way to the front. It was a small guy with a flower-crown. He reminded Calum of Troye Sivan. The type of person you wanted to cuddle and coo about.

"I love you too."

"Do you love Michael?"

"Well, yeah." Calum grinned, looking over to Michael. "Mikey, do you love me?"

"Yeah," Michael called, busy signing something, "do you love me?"

"Course!"

Yeah, but are you in love with me? Both of the boys found themselves thinking. They left a little later, an awkward silence between the two.

"Calum," Michael started, holding his wrist to stop him from walking. "Do you think if I bought you those Nicorette patches, you'd stop?"

So naive. 

"No."

At Calum's blunt answer, Michael frowned, but kept holding onto his wrist as they walked, casually slipping his hand down to the Maori's. Michael had thought this over a million times in his head, and he knew Calum still probably thought Michael was holding hands with him like he used to hold hands with Luke – just because he could.

"Calum, did you . . ." Ashton came out of nowhere, his drumsticks in his hands as he noticed what was going on. "Did I interrupt something?"

"Nah, we were just talking. What's up?" Calum said quickly, seeming a lot more interested in what Ashton had to say as he untangled his hand from the pale boy's.