Crush Imagines

12 || Maybe

Welcome to part two of Lost Soulmate.~
This should be interesting. I can't tell you whether or not you'll need your tissue box because I'm just gonna write and see what flows out.
Enjoy!
-

The outside wall collasped in, killing the others, collasping the supporting wall, collasping the locker block he was sitting against. I held his hand until it was ripped away, almost puking as I watched his blood pool. The hand I was holding, limp and pale.

I rock in a cradle, seeing the way out but why would I want to if everything I had ever need and wanted was right here?

x

"You're not dead?"

I gasp, reaching out and touching the glorious face of the boy I came to love. My thumb grazes over his smooth cheeks, my eyes following my finger in amazement.

His deep chuckles vibrates through me, echoing through me. It sent those chemosignals to my brain that made me feel such an emotion only he could make me feel. A shiver runs through me, a rush flowing straight down my body, so hot it turns cold. It was an odd feeling, almost uncomfortable.

But, I love it.

"Of course I'm not dead." His smile shines so bright, outshining mine. I stare at his teeth, his perfect teeth. I traced their outline with my eyes. I moved to his lips, drawing over every curve, every line in the skin.

"How..?"  It sounds breathless, light and airy. It sounded like my voice was leaving, like I couldn't ask any more questions. Like I had nothing more to say. But that was from the truth. I had so many questions. So many things to tell him.

He didn't seem to mind me touching him, my hands sliding down from his face softly. Running my fingers across his jawline as I moved down to his neck, lower to his collarbone. I breathed slowly and lightly as I touched him, making sure I carefully examined his body.

I wanted to memorize every part. I couldn't forget any moments that we had.

Not again.

"Just let me hold you.."

He whispered into my ear as he slid his hands around my waist, his gentle cheek brushing across mine, his lips scraping my earlobe.

I gripped his shirt as tightly as I could with both fists, not at all worried about remembering the texture. He breathed in my ear, massaging my hips with his thumbs, pressing circles into my skin.

I invited myself closer, pressing my hips against his. My hands slid under his shirt, feeling his toned abdomen. His skin felt so good under my palms. I gasped, my head nestled into his neck. My head that was swirling with confusion, want, lust, anger, depression, anxiety, false hope, and delirious thoughts. With his chin resting gently on the crown of my head, they all perished and I only felt selfish and greedy – for him. He was here and I was going to keep him here.

"...until I'm gone." He bit my earlobe and one of his hands grabbed mine, harshly and roughly. I only looked up into his eyes. They were a ghostly version of the original color. Had I fallen for another mirage?

I held his hand until it was ripped away, almost puking as I watched his blood pool.

I sharply inhaled as he gripped me tighter, his other hand wrapping around my neck. I was stuck, like a deer in headlights. His eyes, ghostly, his lips red, like he had been coughing up blood.

He kissed me deeply, like he was trying to rob me of something. But I had nothing left. He was gone and I was going beyond mad without him. His only replacement, here, loving me to death. To my literal death.

I couldn't help but kiss back, selfish and stupid. Our tongues licked at each other and that's when I tasted it.

His blood.

I was thrown into a frenzy, clawing and kicking at him, trying to get away but all I wanted to do was get closer. Spitting and fighting my love for him away.

He kissed my forehead before he let me go, that lovely chuckle leaving his blood-stained lips. I fell to my knees, my hair falling to cover ny face and I felt his arms around me, trying to comfort me.

"I love you." He spoke softly against my ear, biting it, pulling it with him as he pulled away. He let go and I already knew he was gone. That special emotion? Gone.

x

It's the next year since the disaster. Since then, I've been having anxiety attacks, panic attacks, been diagnosed with depression and anxiety. The nights have been hard. They still are.

Standing in the classroom at orentation, I wasn't paying a damn ounce of attention. I couldn't. I was stuck thinking about how I was supposed to get through a year of school without him in the same building.. Without him in the same world.

I wipe a small tear that got caught in my eyelashes unnoticed.

"Y/N?" I heard his voice in the room. I was having another hallucination. I sighed and sat down at one of the desks, closing my eyes.

I heard my parents tell the teacher about my "struggles" and when I didn't hear anything after that, I knew the teacher was nodding, acting like she understood.  But she didn't. No one does.

I only heard whispers after that, shaking my head and exhaling deeply.

"Y/N." I heard another sharp whisper of my name leaving his mouth. I shook my head again and pressed my hands against my ears.

Despite everything, I heard and felt footsteps run up to my desk. I gasped when I felt hands on my shoulders, that hot to cold rush flowing over me.

A muffled version of my name reached my ears through my hands, making me whimper. This was another strong hallucination.

"Y/N! Look at me!" The hands pulled mine off my ears, making me look up at this person.

My hand slapped over my mouth and I burst into tears, never thinking I would see him again.

Before I had to close my eyes due to the tears blurring my vision, I saw his smile and his arms wrapped around me.

I sobbed, my body jerking at how hard I was crying. My head ended up in his neck and I realize I could smell him, this was real. He was really here and I wasn't going mad right now.

He rubbed my back, kissing my cheek repeatedly. I wrapped one arm around him, the other still covering my mouth.

"How?" I managed to cough out, my cries rough and scratchy. I was bawling now, no wonder my throat was going bad. I could already feel a headache making its way to me.

I could barely hear my parents gasping and talking over my cries, knowing they were close to tears themselves without looking.

"Shh," he whispered. I only nodded, pulling him closer as my tears slightly slowed. I now had both arms around him.

I stood up with my arms still around him so he didn't have to bend over. I cried into his neck as his hands slid down to my thighs and made me wrap my legs around his waist.

x

How come when I ask you to comment, you don't? And when I don't, you do? K cool

And don't ask about this one.. I don't really know..

K gotta blast I STILL GOTTA DO HOMEWORK AND ITS SO LATE