Cupboard Narnia

Cupboard Narnia, Chapter 6

Weeks passed without much happening. Lily's memories crept back into her mind, and over and over she pushed them away. She started at her new school, which wasn't much different from the others before - just as boring and just as ugly. Her 15th birthday rolled round, and she barely noticed. Lily was wrapped up in her own thoughts, too busy pushing away each old memory to pay much attention to what was going on in the present.

It was winter when she finally plucked up the courage to go back inside the cupboard. The forest floor was frosted and icy. She walked briskly towards the clearing, wondering what she'd see. This time, the rockpool was gone. In its place was a Wendy House, covered with snow. Two girls were running around it, seemingly having a snowball fight. Judging by her her hair, which was tied up in bunches, and her bright blue coat, Lily guessed she was about eight. Two years after the divorce. Lucy was with her, wearing a bright pink coat, of the same style, and a matching hat. A fat snowman sat next to them, wearing Lily's hat.

As Lily walked into the clearing, she spotted Liz and Mike standing nearby, clearly making sure things didn't get out of hand with the snowballs. Lily recognised it now - it was Christmas, in 2004. The last year she had stayed with Liz, Mike and Lucy. Harriet and Sarah's wedding had been only months afterwards.

Lily watched happily for a while, remembering all the good things about that Christmas, the waking up with a fat stocking on the end of her bed, the taste of chocolate at four in the morning. The presents, the new bike. Seeing Lucy.

That was when Lucy had started to change. She had been becoming more like Liz since Liz and Mike's wedding, but Lily noticed how different she had been now as she watched herself laughing and stealing Lucy's hat.

"Looooocy!" mini-Lily called. "Come and get it!" the small girl dangled the hat above Lucy, but Lucy just snatched it away.

"Mum got me that hat!" she said angrily.

"No she didn't," Lily said, confused. "Mum sent you the cupcakes. And the posters."

Lucy sighed, as if Lily was very stupid.

"I mean Liz," she said, acting like Lily was a very stupid foreigner.

"Say Liz then," Lily frowned. "Liz isn't our mum."

"She's not your mum," Lucy muttered, scowling, but mini-Lily pretended not to hear.

Hidden in the trees, the real Lily walked away, lost in her own thoughts, soaked in her own returning memories. She thought about that Christmas. Was that really when Lucy had changed?

Sure, she had changed, and at Christmas they didn't feel like twins anymore, but it wasn't until Sarah and Harriet's wedding that they stopped feeling like sisters. Lily wondered when she'd come across that little memory. 

She sure as hell didn't want to.