Just Like Now

Head vs Heart

§§§§§

"Where's Namjoo?" Sehun asked at the breakfast table the following morning. Was she still sick? He knew he should have forced her to eat the porridge he brought home. She probably wasn't eating right or resting enough. He should have warned Lee Chul not to come over and bother her.

"I don't see her car outside," her mother said leaning to look out the window by the counter.

"I heard her heading out this morning," Namjoo's father jumped into the conversation.

"Namjoo? This early?" her mother sounded doubtful.

"She did say she had a research paper to do," her father reminded.

"She should rest a day more," her mother worried sitting down at the table.

"She'll probably come back to sleep once she's done," Sehun assured.

"Oh, but do you know that nice young man?" her mother leaned forward to ask. "A handsome boy came over yesterday. When he heard Namjoo was sick he went back out to buy food for her. He's such a gentleman. It looked like he was trying to cheer her up. Do you know him, Sehun?"

"He's a friend, that's all," Sehun said.

"It certainly looks like he likes our Namjoo," her mother beamed then turned to hit her husband across the arm, "what if he does like our daughter? Oh, I wish she would date him."

"Would you stop speculating," her husband said. "Sehun said they're just friends."

Sehun roved his eyes over the elder couple then turned to his food. Chul liked Namjoo. He'd probably made it obvious in front of her mother. Sehun knew Namjoo's mother would like him, but did Namjoo like him? Did she?

§§§§§

Namjoo had gone to class an hour early. While waiting for class to start she sat in the empty pit room by herself, listening to the silence surround her. She left halfway through the class and slept in the library awaking only three hours later with a hungry stomach. After eating lunch at the school cafeteria she shuffled off to her car in the student parking lot where she sat for another half hour. When the lot started filling up she left and drove toward the river where she found a secluded parking lot. There, she sat in the car watching the waves travel endlessly in one direction.

She wished her life was like the water. Traveling in one direction. It should have been like that. If she were to be friends with Sehun for life, it should have remained that way forever. She shouldn't have developed silly feelings. It shouldn't have happened. Life should have flowed in one direction like it was meant to. Instead, it had veered and she had stumbled off the tracks. And it felt as if she'd slipped downhill. Now she was trapped in the middle of nowhere. Lonely, pitiful, and sad.

She should have gone straight forward.

Clutching onto the steering wheel she leaned into it, burying her face into her arms.

§§§§§

"What are you thinking about?" Seona broke into his thoughts.

They were having lunch in the commons, just the two of them. Today, Sehun's head was elsewhere unimaginably. He should be utterly excited, his attention focused on only Hwang Seona, but today it wasn't like that at all. He was worried.

The Namjoo he knew never woke up early, left before even the breakfast table was set. Breakfast was the most important meal of the day for her. And last night...last night she had closed the door in his face again.

They were off again.

Why?

"I'm worried about Namjoo."