Just Like Now

The Best Friend

§§§§§

Incheon...

The world outside was as dark as it was inside Namjoo's heart. Although from time to time she also felt a tinge of happiness, there was a lot of gloom ever since distancing herself from Sehun. At first it felt worth it, protecting her heart from dropping lower into the pit of her stomach. Now, the days just seem blander, meaningless. She had no friend, was what it felt like. Even if she wanted to go right up to Sehun and begin blabbering nonsense, she couldn't do it. A part of herself had become lost through the process of maintaining her supposed happiness.

Incheon...

No stars were visible tonight. The sky was an exact representation of what she was going through. The only source of light visible was the pint of effort she had in herself. At this point, could it do anything for her?

Where was the friend that completed Sehun's half? The one who laughed, sat, and pained with him? When had she become so dark? Why had she let it become this?

Incheon...

Slowly turning she stared at the wall separating her from Sehun's room. Was he up pondering over things like she, or was he already asleep and dreaming of someone else?

Still, it wasn't like the happiness was non-existent. Compared to Sehun, she valued him a million lifetimes more than what he simply thought of her. And because she liked him...too much.

That was the problem. The reason for her darkness.

Would she be ready to open her arms and call him a friend while loving him at the same time? Would it not hurt?

It would hurt. It would hurt as much as their friendship.

That's why Incheon might not work. What help would it be? Her head wasn't clouded. She saw clearly and she knew it was at the sidelines where she belonged, because Sehun had Seona. She was nothing but an onlooker and could be nothing more than a measly friend.

Burying her face into the palm of her hands she breathed. Having Sehun as a friend was at the cost of her own heart.

She wasn't ready.

§§§§§

"Incheon?" Yunyeong repeated with ridiculed disbelief. "Why there? That's only 30 minutes away. Might as well go all the way down south."

Namjoo eyed her friend from across the table outside a bakery with a lowered brow. Not only had Yunyeong thrown a fit of befuddled rage at the fact that Sehun had a girlfriend, but she was now complaining about Sehun's decisions as if he was someone she didn't know.

"I'm not going," Namjoo said.

Leaning forward abruptly with a hand landing on the tabletop Yunyeong declared, "You better not. You'd be no better than following a flock of sheep. Don't fall that low."

Huffing out her stress Yunyeong snatched her Frappuccino and sipped on the straw busily. Her eyes curiously watched as a couple walked out together happily. "Why couldn't you have chosen a man who'd easily make you smile like that instead of dense Sehun?"

"I wish I knew," Namjoo mumbled watching the pair disappear down the busy street. "I really wish I knew..."

"I mean," Yunyeong leaned forward again, "there's got to be someone who likes you if Sehun can't see the good in you. Trust me, someone Sehun can't compare to will show up."

That wasn't very comforting, but Namjoo appreciated her friend's effort to cheer her up.

"Anyway," Yunyeong went on, "lets party all week when your mid-term finals are finished. We can go clubbing, have hookups, blind dates and all that you know. There's too many things a single lady like us should be enjoying instead of mulling over some idiot guy. Right? Am I right or am I right?"