Chapter 9

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Emry's POV

I hold my clutch close to my stomach. I stare at the large line waiting to get in. "It looks a bit crowded don't you think?" I mumble to Joe. "That's the point, love. It's a club." He emphasizes and laughs. I look at the club with wide eyes and take in a deep breath. Joe looks at me in worry. I weakly try and smile. Good thoughts Emry. Think good thoughts. Nothing bad will happen. It will be fine. It's okay. I try and tell myself but it doesn't help me enough as I still feel my body beggining to shut down. We all walk to the line. I am shaking very violently. I try to hold it in. I feel a very very warm hand clutch onto mine which makes me jump. "Woah Emmy you are freezing!!" Joe says. I didn't notice because I felt like one hundred degrees. He pulls me tighter probably trying to warm me up. I didn't have a jacket because I forgot one. Joe takes his brown soft bomber jacket off and puts it around me and hugs me. We get to the front of the line and everyone pulls out their ID's and I rush to unbutton my clutch I search through it very quickly and dig out my ID. I pull it out and give it to the man and Joe gave his to the woman next to the man. Joe is close by the door looking at me waiting. I skip to him. "It will be fun!" He smiles and reassures me. I smile and nod slowly. It will be fun. I repeat in my head. I walk in with Joe. It immediately gets loud and even more hot. I look around at all of the fit, beautiful women. It makes me even more nervous to be here. We have already lost JJ, Jack, Josh, Conor, Marcus, and Alexa. I'm standing with Joe, Niomi, and Oli. We walk over to the bar and I sit down so does Niomi but the boys keep standing. Oli and Joe order alcoholic drinks and Niomi and I order fruity drinks as I don't drink and Niomi drinks only a bit. I pull out my phone trying to calm down. When I look up everyone around me had then went somewhere else. If no one is watching me then that means I can just leave. Right? No Emry you can do this. I take a drink and didn't want to be alone or look awkward so I get up and go to the middle of the dance floor. Not sure why. I feel bodies close to me and I immediatley regret enerything. I look at all the girls in short tiny little dresses stuck on their perfect hourglass, skinny bodies. I hug myself and as I look around not seeing an exit my vision goes blurry, I feel sick to my stomach. I look for a friend that isn't there. I need to leave. Now. I hurry and push past people harshly trying to get through. As I come in contact with people my body tingles and makes me feel like I could just fall on the ground. I run to the bright red sign and push on the heavy door as quickly as I can. The door opens and I trip outside. I smell the thick, rank, harsh smoke it almost pushes me over. I fall to the cobbled pathway. I don't mind that I will have scabs I just couldn't take it anymore. I feel my hair spill over my shoulders and tears come to the edge of my eyes. I shut my eyes harshly and push myself to stand back up. And then I go back in. The first thing I see is Joe dancing in the middle of the room with a girl with brown hair and a dazzling tan. She is perfect, huge boobs, giant butt, small waist, little thighs and a perfect face. My eyes practically pop out of my head. My breathing gets very loud almost like my throat has began to swell. I just kept staring at them. I feel my chin quiver and I get the massive chills. I see Niomi pop up right next to me. I jump scared I wasn't sure how she got there. "You look like you have seen a ghost! Are you okay?" She asks. She is very loud and I don't look at her in the eyes. "I've just seen something that made me feel reall really ill all of the sudden. I'm gonna get some fresh air." I say trying to flood the scene. She nods and hugs me. I let go quicly and sprint out of the door. I stop and I hear the door swing open. I look behind me and see a man throw up. I shutter and step away. And then I ran. I ran all the way back home. Not stopping for anything. Not anyone.

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I slam the door of my flat shut and my eyes still wide I stand their in the silence of my flat. I want Jamie. She always knows how to make me feel better. I look the front door and I have lost my appetite since seeing the man get sick and before that.........So I sit on the couch and turn on my TV. BBC Joe and Caspar Hit The Road. "Fuck. Get out of my life!!!!" I yell at the TV and shut it off and throw the remote on the ground. I get up quickly and pace around the upstairs of my flat. Just walking in circles. I take out my phone and dial a number I hadn't dialed in about 3 years. "Come on pick up." I repeat. Then it goes quiet and I hear a "Hello?" He says in his strong american accent. I get happy and nervous. "Hey Luke, It's- it's Emry." I stutter. "Em?" He asks in dibelief. "Yea, I need a friend. You are my oldest friend, you know everything. Where abouts are you?" I ask. "Well- um- you know I'm back in America Em." He says. I swing my head down and want to cry. "I- I-" I say and he cuts me off. "It's fall almost holiday- well close enough and Em I miss you. I want to see you and England again. I'll see you on Monday." He states. I smile "But what if-" I ask. "Oh no. You forgot I know you best. Now we are both going to hang up and I'm going to pack and you will tidy up and get ready for Monday." He says. "Alright." I nod in disbeilief but with a big smile on my face. And then he hangs up. And so do I. I have completely forgotten about all the drama. and focus on the fact that I am going to be able to see my bes friend in one day technically. I smile at thought until I am broken out of my thoughts with my phone that goes off. I look down at my phone. It is a text message. I open it and it is from Caspar

Caspar| Where are you?

Emry| I left, was feeling ill.

Caspar| Can I come and try and make you feel better? I feel terrible about myself...of how I have treated you.

I check the time on my phone looking for an excuse.

Emry| Caspar it is 12 in the morning, It's a bit inconvinent. Don't you think?

Caspar| No not at all.

Emry| Okay but be ready, I haven't spilled my guts to anyone yet tonight, and I have seen a little too much. And by the way I am not actually ill just saw something that made my stomach turn.

Caspar| Be over in about 5

He sounds like he is rushing over. And it makes me feel weird. Because Joe and I are a thing right? But he was dancing with that girl? So does that mean he likes her? Wait but he was drinking? Wait Caspar fancys me? Everything was rolling around in my head. I sit on my couch and wait while I stare at the wall. Fighting my thoughts. I hear a knock on the door and I jolt up. I get to the door and open it. I see pineapple boy. "Helloo," I say. I noticed I was still in my dress and I hated it because after tonight I felt very self concious. He was still in his going out clothes also so I didn't feel very out of place. I walk in and he gets in the flat and shuts the door for me. "Thank you for letting me see you, I really wanted to talk to you and I didn't want to be with the others." He says. We go to the couch to sit and chat. "Okay you can start I guess." I smile. He nods "You know I saw you kiss Joe." He says I look away a little bit and he continues making me look back at him. "And well I got really jealous because you are really beautiful and perfect. And I just I don't know I am stupid." He says. I blush and shake my head. "No Caspar you aren't stupid." I say. He hesitantly nods and continues. "I'm guessing you saw what I tweeted...That was wrong of me. I am sorry. I shouldn't have done that as I had no right to. And. Tonight Jim told me that you switched the name cards so you didn't have to seat between me and Joe. I hate myself for putting you through that stress." I stop him. "No don't hate yourself for it. It isn't your fault and I am just not a big fan of drama.....with me." I finish. "Okay. But I felt terrible of it and then I thought you did it because you didn't like me and me being the selfish person I am I wanted to make you jealous. So I pretended to be with Alexa or whatever I was trying to do." He puts his face in his hands. I get closer to him and hug him. I hear him start crying. "It's alright Caspar. We are both okay." I say and he hugs me back. I can feel him shaking. I let go of him and his face is a little bit blotchy but it is really adorable. "Now you." He says wiping his nose "Sorry? Now me what?" I ask. "When we were texting you said that you had something to tell me too." He says. "Oh yea but after all the trouble I put you through tonight I think it is just....nothing." I apologize. "No, Oh no Emry. It won't make me feel worse if anything it make me feel better." He smiles. "Okay then I guess." I shrug. "I felt out of place at the club tonight. I just sat at the bar for maybe 20 minutes on my phone. When I looked up everyone was gone. So I thought if I went to the dance floor I could find one of you. I didn't so I got really worried and went outside. When I went back in I saw-" I swollow the lump in my throat "I saw Joe dancing with this girl. It would be okay with me if he wouldn't of showed me all of these signs that he likes me and since he did that the grinding just looked really wrong. Niomi then came up to me and I made up something and I went outside, saw a man throw up and then I guess I ran home." I say. "What a dick." Caspar says shaking his head. "No not really. Well I guess maybe. But I don't know. I think I am just overthinking it. He is drunk and I'm me. First off I sat at the bar. But to be honest I really wanted him to ask me to dance. And-" I get cut off. "It's okay slow down you're talking a million miles per hour." He chuckles. "I'm sorry just nervous." I say. I then look at him. He is staring at me and honestly I am not sure why. I am so ugly. He leans closer and so did I and our lips touched lightly but then I let go. He leans back and looks down. "You do." He states. "I do what?" I ask. "You really do love Joe don't you." He says and looks up at me. "NO WAY! He is a dickhead!" I shout. He laughs and shakes his head. "Wow. You are so madly in love." He says. "No-" I stop. "He is a dickhead. And probably doesn't deserve you but I can make him pick up his act for you." He says standing up. "Wait what?" I ask. "I'm gonna go. You need to get some sleep." He says. I nod and stand up. I hug him and then we walk to the door and I watch him leave. I lock the door and shut down the lights. I felt better. I walked downstairs and into my room. I take off my makeup then my dress. I slip into a blue to white ombre hoodie and I put some black joggers on. I get on my bed and lie down in the dark silence. And then I drift away to a peaceful sleep. 


A/N Quite a short chapter just cause I feel it should stop there. Tomorrow she is going to see Jamie. Happy bout that??? Have good day guys! xxx

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