In Time

Chapter 9: Feeling guilty

Justin's pov

I woke up pretty early this morning. I notice that tori was still asleep, so I decided to take a shower before she woke. I quickly undressed and hopped in the shower. I felt tense with the ice cold water rushing down my back. It soon turned to a nice warm feeling. My muscles were starting to relax and I could finally be one with my thoughts. Was this right of us to have sex after not seeing each other for three years? Our son was right next door. I was feeling so guilty because I felt like we had just become friends again and now we were giving each other up. Granted it wasn't our first time, obviously, but still it was made clear that we were just going to be friends for now. We didn't know how long it would be until 'now'. I guess, now. I turned the water off and wrapped the towel around me. I walked out of the bathroom to see tori was now up and on her phone. "Goodmorning babe!" She said seeming as happy as ever. We were babes already. This is gonna sound really douche baggy but we only just had sex last night. I didn't expect us to be dating after. Of course it's what I wanted, but now that we have a son I want to put my time and energy into spending time with him. "Morning." I said trying to seem enthusiastic. She smiled and got up to walk over to me. She started to kiss my neck and rub my abs. "What's the matter? You look tired. To busy last night to sleep?" She said looking at me with her beautiful smile as she gave me a seductive wink. "Uh ya haha" I slowly tried to back away but she only came closer to me. "Wanna hop in the shower with me?" She looked so cute. I totally would if I didn't feel so guilty. "Um well I just took a shower and I still have Ryan's car. I was gonna go back to jades house and change then see if we all wanted to go out to breakfast." I couldn't help but feel and probably look nervous. She smiled once again. "Uh ya ok so then just text me with plans I guess." I could tell this smile was fake, like she was disappointed. I gave her a small smile before grabbing my clothes from the bathroom and going to change in her huge closet. Once I had my clothes back on I went downstairs and grabbed my keys. I noticed a picture of tori and drew hanging on the wall that I hadn't seen until now. I grinned at the picture and walked out of the house.

I walked up the steps to jade house and knocked on the door. Jade answered and all she did was smile. I gave her a grin back, but before I could walk up the stairs she stopped me. "So justin where were you last night" she smirked. I was standing on the first step. "Um I stayed over at Tori's house" I said scratching the back of my head. "Oh really, so like what did you guys do?" Have sex. "Nothing much. Just watched tv I fell asleep on the couch so I just stayed the night." She nodded her head slightly before turning around towards the kitchen. I need to find Ryan. I walked into jades room to see Ryan sitting at the edge of the bed on his phone. "Hey Ry could I talk to you?" "Hey man, where were you last night, Tori's?" I nodded and sat on the swivel chair at the desk. "So what's up?" He asked putting his phone on the charger. "Um so last night I slept over at Tori's house and after we put drew to bed, we were talking about why she had left and why I had cheated and I told her the I loved her." I had my head down and had my hands clasped together tightly. "That's great man! Why do you seem so upset by it?" I sighed. "Well after I told her things got pretty heated and to make a long story short, we had sex." I said. I didn't even bother looking up at Ryan. I knew he would be disappointed. "Man, I don't know what to tell you. Was it bad is that why you look upset?" I shook my head rapidly. "No no god no. She's amazing. I just feel guilty because we just became friends again and then we had sex. Amazing sex at that." I got up and was now walking back and forth. "I just, now that I know I have a son I wanted him to be my main focus. Of course I do actually love tori. I don't want to ruin our friendship. You know? Now I don't even know what we are or what she thinks we are. She called me babe this morning and to be honest it freaked me out a little." Ryan sighed. His eyes were following me back and forth as I walked. "Justin, the best thing to do is to tell her exactly what you just told me. Tell her your scared right now and you want to build a relationship with drew before anything. I'm telling you she will understand." I nodded my head and sat on the edge of the bed. "Man, I hate seeing you like this. I know your crazy about her. I can see it when you talk about her and look at her. When we were California I could tell when you were even thinking about her. You looked so distant and depressed. You finally look happy again and that's the Justin I love to see. You're my brother jay. I'm always gonna worry about you and have your back. I love you man." I looked at Ry. The first genuine smile of the day formed on my lips. We stood up and man hugged. "I love you too bro." We let go and I walked out to the guest room to change.