In Time

Chapter 13: We need to talk

Justin's P.O.V. 

"We need to talk"

Hearing those words made me nervous and slightly excited. She didn't have a tone in her voice so I couldn't tell if she was either ready for this conversation or just ready to get it over with. We walk downstairs and she sits at the countertop in the kitchen. I stand on the other side so were facing each other. She has her phone out and is playing with it. She seems on edge. Not nervous but like she wants to just quickly say whats on her mind. 

"You know I love you, right? Whatever you decide to do I will one hundred percent support." She nods her head and puts her phone in her back pocket. "Thats the thing Justin, I don't know what I want. I want to go with you to LA but I know I might regret it and I don't want us to hate each other because it turns out you haven't changed and Drew gets so used to having you around and having you be here then suddenly you're not there. I just couldn't do that to him. But at the same time, I so badly want to get back into the studio. Being there with Gavin this past week has made me realize how much I love it." She has tears in her eyes, I can see it, but she holds them back to look strong. I don't know what to say, she just told me exactly how she feels and I have no words. The worst part about this is I know she's looking for an answer in me and I just don't have one. "Justin, I need to know you've changed. Introducing Drew to the world is going to be so hard and I will need you more then I've ever needed someone in my life. You can't disappear every time something gets hard or resort to partying or hooking up with other girls." I felt triggered. I know what I did was stupid and I know I made mistakes, but I never realized it caused Tori to not trust me anymore. Thats what killed me the most. She doesn't trust me. It became so clear as to why she found it so hard to make this decision. I needed to show her she can trust me. "Tori, you have to understand that happened so long ago and I'm a completely different person now. I don't hang out with those people at all anymore. When I came back from that trip I took with that random girl, I knew I made a mistake, the biggest of my life. I cried everyday and night. My music career was over, I made the girl I planned on marrying leave, and all my friends left me. I deserved all of it. But you know what Tori, I learned from those mistakes. I took time off, went back to Canada and improved myself. I had a therapist, she helped me through all of my problems. I learned so much about how to love people, including myself. I learned how to appreciate people for who they are and not what they can provide for me. I hated myself for thinking you never gave me anything. You gave me a chance when we first met, you loved me through all the bullshit I put you through, you put up with me and the troubles that came with, and now you've given me a child. I can't ever thank you enough for this gift. You don't see it, but you are the best thing that happened in my life. I wouldn't be the man I am if it weren't for you. I know it will take a while for you to trust me, but I love you. I will do anything to make you happy. If thats leaving you to live your life here with Drew, then I'll leave. If it means staying here with you guys until you're ready, then I'll stay. Whatever you want I will try my very best to give you that." By now I had tears in my eyes as well as Tori. She smiled at me and let out a giggle. She got up from her seat and walked around the counter. She wrapped her arms around my torso and squeezed tightly. I felt her tears soak through my shirt but that was the least of my concerns. I swung my arms around her neck and hugged her just as tight. We stood there for a while. I could stay like this forever. I know its going to take a while for her to trust me again, but I'm willing to do whatever I can to show her I'm here for the long run. 

Tori's P.O.V.

It was around 7 o'clock now. Justin had gone to the store to get food to make for dinner. I guess as part of his whole 'I'm going to make you trust me again'. I'm really happy we talked and put all that stuff behind us for now. I want Justin to feel he can tell me exactly how he feels whether I'll like it or not. I don't want to be the girl that indirectly controls what he says and does. He seems to be making way more of an effort to be together and more importantly make our family work. I still am not sure what I want to do in regards to moving to California. I love it there and if I didn't have a kid, it would be so different. I have to consider Drew in everything I do now. I heard the door open and Justin walked in with three bags of food. I saw the top of a wine bottle and got really excited. "You don't know how happy it makes me that you bought this." I grabbed the bottle from the bag and walked over to the cabinet with wine glasses. Pulling out two while setting down the bottle on the counter. I placed the bottle under the electric bottle opener near the fridge. Justin picked up stuff to make spaghetti and meatballs, which was my favorite. He went over to put the bags in the trash and turned around to put his arms around me. I smiled while pouring the wine. He bent down to kiss my neck then unraveled his arms from me. He walked over to the stereo to put some light music on, before starting dinner. 

I finished setting the table and put both of our glasses on the dining room table. Justin walked over with a big bowl of pasta. I sat down and Justin ran into the kitchen to turn the stove off then came and sat back down. I put a big helping on my plate as did Justin. We sat there eating our dinner, drinking our wine and sitting in silence. The music still lightly playing. I could hear John Mayers' distinct voice and it made me smile. The only other person I was obsessed with besides my son and Justin, was John Mayer. I quietly hummed to the current song. "Justin, this was a really nice meal." I said suddenly. I didn't even expect myself to say it and I think I kind of startled Justin, but I pretended I didn't notice. "Thank you, Tor. Your humming is very nice. I was falling into a daydream because of it." I smiled a little at Justin's low chuckle. I'll be completely honest, I'm kind of turned on by his laugh. i smiled to myself before taking another sip of my wine. "You know, it's nice having a kid and all, but I'm loving the quietness." Justin looked up at me. Catching his eyes, I could tell it wouldn't be much longer before we both had no clothes on. "He's been out for a while. We should go check on him." Justin suggests, totally killing the mood. I nod and set my glass down. We leave the plates and everything else on the table as we walk up the stairs to Drew's room. 

Opening the door, I can already see the bathroom light was left on. I walk over to turn it off, but glance at Drew in bed. He was out like a light. Justin sits on the edge of the bed and begins to rub his bed in a soothing way. I catch myself smiling at the sight before me. Justin is so great with Drew. I really couldn't imagine separating Drew and Justin. This was so hard to think about. 

// Kind of a boring chapter sorry