In Time

Chapter 12: Contemplating L.A.

Its been about a week since I've started working with Gavin in the studio. Yes, we are on first name basis and yes, I couldn't be more happy. Working with him has been a dream come true. At first we had another producer come in while I was working on the track with Gavin, but now its just Gavin, Billy and me. Gavin informed me that he would only be working out here for a week, so today is actually his last day in North Carolina. I was sad about it but we were working on something great that I know people will love. 

Justin has been staying with me which has been great. He watches Drew while I go to work. Having Justin here is amazing and I can really tell that he has changed so much. I still am really scared to even think about what life would be like if Drew and I moved back to California. I think I could honestly do it if we weren't moving to Los Angles. Anywhere else, I would go in an instant. I know Justin loves L.A. and I wouldn't want him to put on hold what he loves for me. It's just silly considering we aren't officially dating again. I can tell that right now his main focus is Drew and he's made that perfectly clear. I have absolutely no problem with that either. I just wish he would take a second to realize that whatever decision he makes with me and our relationship, Drew is automatically apart of that. I don't want him to think its either me or Drew because thats definitely not what I want. I'm not even a hundred percent sure I want Drew even living in California. What sucks the must is that Justin won't sit and have this conversation with me. I really wish he would because my thoughts are all over the place. 

"Hey Tori, I super excited to get right to work on this. I came up with some stuff last night and I really think your going to like it." I had just walked into the studio. Gavin and Billy were already sitting in chairs with a notepad out. I walked over to put my stuff down on the side of the table. "Wow, you guys are here early. I figured I would have some time to set stuff up." I smiled at them and they laughed. "Well, like I said, I couldn't even sleep last night, I was so excited to show you the stuff I got." I sat down and turned on all the boards and computers. "Ok, lets hear it. Do you want to just sing it to me here, or do you want to get right into the booth with this stuff?" He got up and walked into the booth. I nodded my head and made sure everything was prepared to record. He started singing and it sounded absolutely breath taking. I smiled through the entire song he had written down. I looked over at Billy how looked like a proud father. 

We've been at this song for about five and a half hours now. Gavin couldn't seem to get down what he wanted and Billy and I were so tired of watching him walk back and forth in the booth. "Gavin, maybe give this one a rest and move onto a new song for now. I think your trying so hard to make it perfect that its not living up to your standards." Billy said into the intercom so Gavin cold hear him. Gavin nodded his head and took of the headphones. He walked out and put the notepad down on the mixing board. "what do you say?" Billy said to Gavin. Gavin seemed tired and I won't lie I was exhausted. "I guess we can call it a day. You did a really nice job cleaning stuff up, Tori." I smiled at him and gave him a single nod meaning thank you. "have you thought about coming back to LA yet?" I nodded my head, "I did, and I'm not entirely sure if thats something I can do yet. I have a son now and I don't know if I want him in that light yet. People finding out would have a field day once they found out its Justin's" Gavin looked at me with a surprised look. "Is that why you disappeared? Because you were pregnant?" I nodded my head again, "And now Justin is becoming a big part of Drew's life and I don't even think I'm ready to answer all those questions, let alone have Drew be in the centerfold of it all." Gavin and Billy nodded meaning they understood where I was coming from. "Well whenever you are ready, I will release the song you wrote with me. I won't do it now, given your situation but if you think about it, it could be a great comeback song." I smiled and got up to give Gavin a hug. I'm happy I got to work with him, not only to fulfill my life long dream, but I learned  a lot from him. 

I walked into my house after the day was over. Even though it was only a six hour day, it felt like I was there for twenty hours. I walked into the kitchen, putting my bag down on the counter. I walked over to the fridge to grab something to drink. It was unusually quiet in the house, but then I remembered Justin telling me him and Ryan were taking the kids to the Lake today. I sat down on the couch and began to fall asleep. 

Justins P.O.V.

Ryan and I took the kids to the lake today. Jade's dad had a boat that he said we could use. We had been out in the water for about four hours already. Ryan and I both drinking a beer while the kids played with toys on the floor of the boat. "So man, have you decided if your coming back with us?" Ryan asked before taking a chug of his beer. I looked out to the water, "I don't know man. I really want Tori and Drew to come back and live with me, but I know she doesn't want Drew in the spotlight." Ryan nodded his head. "Maybe you should actually talk to her because she might feel the same way." Ryan paused for a moment because continuing to say, "You know thats what your guys problem is. You don't talk to each other. I think the bigger thing for you guys to figure out is how to say whats on your mind without feeling like your wrong. If she has something to say, shut up and listen to her, even if it doesn't make sense. She's always going to think she's right and you just have to go along with it." I chuckled at Ryan, he seemed so agile. "You know man, your right. I'll talk to her." He nods his head and we both take a sip of our beer. 

Drew and I just got back from the lake. It was pretty fun and I had a great talk with Ryan. I just need to tell Tori whats on my mind and vice versa. Hopefully, we can figure this out because I love Tori and I don't want to dismiss that. Drew is asleep on my shoulder, so I brought him up to his room right away. I didn't bother trying to bathe him. I just changed his clothes and put him in bed. I stood in the doorway watching him sleep. I couldn't believe I had kid. I thought about how I was going to tell my mom and Scooter. What was the world going to think when they found out? I started to worry that Tori might never want to come back and I don't blame her. Why would she want to put Drew through that, I wouldn't. I suddenly felt hands on my sides. I immediately knew it was Tori. I turned slightly still watching Drew but acknowledging that I knew she was behind me. She got up on her tippy toes and whispered in my ear.

 "We need to talk."