Somewhere in the Middle

When She Was Smiling

It took too long for everyone to go to sleep.

Lucas and Greg had been in the back lounge for hours after the show, the constant melodic, but repetitive strumming of a guitar telling Jamie they were attempting to do what he could not.

Months had gone by since the last time he'd written. Months during which time he'd tried to put pen to paper. Tried to hear the music around him. Tried, and failed.

Hearing his friends succeed at it now—it sounded pretty damn good—was only making him angry.

Jamie hated being confined here. But he would've hated it more to be out there, unable to contribute. So he laid in his bunk, the curtain drawn, allowing everyone to think he'd gone to sleep, when really, he was reading until all went quiet. Not just the kind of quiet that meant people were settling in—the kind of quiet that told him they were fast asleep. No shuffling sounds of movement, only the long, quiet exhales of a slumber that he couldn't slip into.

Not without a little help.

Carefully, he slipped down from his top bunk to find closed curtains spanning the hallway, and breathed a sigh of relief as he passed each of them, eager to get to the cabinet, eager to talk with Henry, eager to -

There was a light on up ahead.

There was never a light on up ahead at this hour.

Pete went to sleep earlier than all of them. He was usually out cold by 1.

It was after 3.

Jamie didn't want to turn around though. This was supposed to be his time to do with what he pleased, and if he had to be stuck on this goddamned bus, he needed to have it alone.

With the hope that someone had just forgotten to turn the light off before heading to bed, Jamie stepped forward into the front lounge.

Evie sat at the table. Her hair was sitting in a large bun high on her head, her laptop open in front of her, and she was typing away, her brows drawn together, and her lips scrunched up, like she needed them that way to focus.

And all Jamie could think was that she couldn't see him. Couldn't know that he came out here every night. Couldn't know that this time was supposed to be his.

"Oh," her voice said. Surprise. An E.

But she didn't say anything more. Jamie was already half-turned, pissed off that he had to go back to his bunk, but faced her when he heard the noise. Met her stare.

Her eyes were so green.

"I didn't think anyone else was up," she said, her eyes never moving from his face.

Jamie waited, hopeful, but she didn't stand up.

"Neither did I," he said, and didn't try to hide his disdain.

But either she didn't hear it, or she didn't care. "I just... I have some work to finish up, and I couldn't sleep, so I thought I'd come out here and get it done."

Jamie didn't know what to say, so he didn't answer.

"You can stay if you want." She was eyeing him like she'd cornered him, like he was a trapped animal, one she had to cajole into trusting her. "I'm almost done anyway."

It was more than annoying. She was inviting him to stay? She'd only been on this damn bus for a week. He should be inviting her, not the other way around.

And what was worse, her sitting there meant he absolutely could not open his cabinet, take the drink he so desperately wanted. It meant that he couldn't be alone with his thoughts, couldn't fully relax. And if he stayed with her now, would she be here tomorrow night, too? And every night after that?