markiplier imagines ♡

17; letting go ♡

A/N: WARNING there is suicidal thoughts, depression, and self harm in this imagine so read at your own risk.
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You woke up again. You opened your eyes and sighed. Another day. You stretch and get out of bed, you look at your phone and still no text from Mark.

He didn't care about you. He wouldn't care if you lived or died.

You looked down to your wrists. Why do you put yourself through so much pain when you could just end it all ? You want to , so badly. You don't know what it is holding youself back, Mark ? You doubt it.

You put on a sweatshirt to hide your scars and leave your apartment complex. You reach the local coffee shop and order your favorite drink and sit down at a table near the back. You pull out your favorite novel and begin to read.

You wanted to feel something, anything. You couldn't find joy in the book anymore. You couldn't find joy in your favorite coffee anymore. You felt empty. You felt nothing.

You sigh and exit the coffee shop. You walk by your reflection in a glass window and just stare. What have you become? Why do you feel numb all of the time ? What happened to you ?

You hear a ding coming from your phone and look to see that it was a text from Mark.

" I'm sorry, I just can't do it anymore. I am in love with someone else. "

You lock your phone and walk back home. You were done. You didn't want to wake up tomorrow or the next day or the next day.

You enter your apartment and take you jacket off. You go to the bathroom and find the first bottle of medication that you find. You take as many pills as you can. You don't want to breathe anymore.

You go to the bedroom and lay down staring at the ceiling, waiting for the darkness to consume you. You lay there until all you can see was black and the world became silent.

.......

.....beep......beep......beep

Did I die ?

You open your eyes and look to the left. A monitor was beeping and it was giving you a headache. You look down at your body. You were wearing a hospital gown. The was an officer outside of your room. You blinked a few times and heard something beside you. It was crying ?

You look to your right and there sat Mark, covered in tears.

" Hey your awake ? ", he said trying to form a smile.

" What happened , i thought i died. ", you say with a single tear running down your face.

" You overdosed but I got you to the hospital in time. " , he said looking down at his feet.

" How did you know ? ", I ask.

" When I texted you I saw you on the street. I wanted o make sure you were okay so I followed you to your apartment. I texted you again to come out and talk to me. I texted you several times and you didn't reply. I used the spare key to come in and check on you and I saw you. ", he stops and sobs.

" I saw you with an empty pill bottle in your hand and you wouldn't wake up. ", he breaks out into tears. 

" I didn't mean to do this to you y/n. I'm so sorry.  I broke you. ", he said with his hands in his face.

" Mark, you didn't make me feel this way. I made myself feel this way. I just wanted it all to end. I am so tired Mark. I'm just so tired. ", I say looking down at my hospital wrist band.

" I don't want to feel numb anymore. "

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A/N: Okay end of the imagine. I wanted to write one based off of depression because of personal reasons. I know some of you may not like it but that's why I put the warning before anyone can read it.

I hope you guys like all of my imagines so far and thank you so much for almost 1K reads that's awesome !!