This can't be so

05

It starts to get dark and I wish I was home with my puddin' right now. I didn't realise how much I really needed him. As I turn to start walking back, preparing to be beaten I feel a light breeze.

"Harleen!" A voice cries out and before I can figure out what is happening I am grabbed and thrown into the boot of a car.

"Let me out! Let me out right now!" I yell furious that I didn't see who had just taken me. Who ever they were they are strong and quick at grabbing people. I kick repeatedly at the car boot. I wanted out, I need my puddin'! I didn't bring my phone, heck I don't even have a small knife. There aren't any signs of light so I can't see anything.

"Let me out please!" I start to sob angry tears and desperately scratching at my skin as if that would help me escape.

"Let me OUT!" I scream louder and smash at the boot with my hands and feet. Nothing happened. I tugged at my hair and screamed till my throat was raw. I felt the car slow and stop. I was ready, ready to scratch, bite or otherwise harm who had taken me. The car boot opened and I lunged at the figure. I repeatedly punched and kicked but it was no good. I could see where I was. Home.

<><><><>

The figure I had been beating was one of puddin's henchmen. I forced myself out of the car and ran for the house. With full force I shoved the large front door open and fell into the arms of Mr J, he did not look pleased to see me. Even so I flung my arms around him and pulled myself as close to him as I could. He shoved me back so forcefully my head collided with the wall. I felt betrayed and empty, he didn't want me back. He didn't love me, he was going to kill me! He grabbed me firmly and slung me over his shoulder. I didn't struggle, I knew where I was going. Where I went the first time he took me. He cuffed me to a small uncomfortable bed, when he shut the door all light was stolen from the room. I lay there staring at the roof, tears slipping silently down my cheeks and making the rock hard pillow beneath my head soggy. I cried myself to sleep.

<><><><>

"Now Harleen, why did you run and think you would get away with it?" Mr J sneered, his teeth glinting in the low light. The room was timeless, it could be an hour later, a day heck it could even be a week if he drugged me enough.

"Puddin' please let me out, I will make it up to you! Anything you want Mr J." I ramble searching his eyes for a hint of love, a hint of any emotion would be great. A hit of a smirk crossed his face and the glint of silver showed from the corner of my eye. Soon a knife was right in front of my eye, I was sure he was going to blind me. He didn't love me, he never did. I wish someone else had taken me, then he might feel bad and try to get me back. Who am I kidding, he wouldn't want me back! He says he wants me dead, he calls me a whore and a slut. Love isn't supposed to be like this.

"What are you thinking about?" Mr J questioned obviously curious. I closed my eyes and shook my head. Tears started falling and my body was shaking lightly.

"Someone is scared, you should be." He laughed, a growl developing in his throat. My chest heaves and I feel exhausted. Slowly Mr J presses the blade against my throat. and slices. He was going to kill me now, this was it! The white hot pain forced screams from me but I knew better that to struggle. Slowly he sliced my skin, thick warm blood seeped from the cuts covering my naked chest. Half an hour passes of pain. Cuts, punches and beatings with a whip. I felt like I was going to pass out from exhaustion and pain. I was panting, sweating and tears stained my cheeks.

"Puddin please stop." I croaked out, desperation crossing my features.

"Please, please, please." I trailed off fresh tears falling. Mr J stood and left the room. I was still tied down and I was a mess of blood, sweat and tears. I could finally go to sleep.

<><><><>Some Time Later<><><><>

The door creaked open, the metal rubbing against the ground.

"Harley, have you learned your lesson?" Mr J asked, voice filled with determination and confidence. I couldn't talk even if I tried. My throat was raw and dry. I just wanted out, I wanted Mr J to love me. I know he does but I just wish he loved me enough to not hurt me.

"Harley." He taunted walking closer. I didn't want to look at him, I wanted to keep my eyes closed and ignore the world. I felt him slap me and my head jerked to the side. I didn't have the energy to move it back but I force myself to open my eyes.

"No words? Come on, lets get you out of this room and you can clean yourself up." My wrists were released from the metal cuffs and my ankles were untied. I was still half naked and covered in blood but I could get up finally. When I stood i felt dizzy but refused help from Mr J. I brushed his hands away from me and shuffled to the bathroom. The warm water burned in my cuts but it felt good to finally be rid of the filth. The sun was down but I still couldn't guess what day it was. Slowly I scrubbed at my hair so it was clean. The colour had started to fade from the ends of my hair. I was tempted to ask Mr J to do it again but I still didn't want to talk. I hadn't dared lock the bathroom door so I wasn't surprised when it opened. The glass shower door opened and I saw Mr J staring at me. I didn't want to do anything with him. I just wanted to get clean and sleep.

"Finish getting clean and I will fix up your hair." I nodded and finished washing the last of the soap off. When I got out he wrapped a large towel around me and sat me down in front of the full length mirror.