Sin

Dreams, Dreams, Dreams

The long I stated in empty and lonely office more i got scared. I do not know why, but there was something that made me unconformable. Office was bright, warm and friendly during day time but as soon as it was over 6 and most of the employees were gone, it turned into something unreal, like you know when you get in the scare room in amusement parks, you know there is someone who's gonna jump but you have no clue when and where or even who. That what i felt. Mostly all the time i had to stay after work, not because i was obliged to rather i loved staying, i was more capable and more productive in the evenings, when no one could distract me then in the normal working hours.  

I love my job. I really do. It is fascinating, interesting. I met a lot of new people, made friends with people i would never had imagined. New York was friendly with me, though i  had feeling it will bring something unpleasant sooner or later. 

I was doing good. Pretty good, actually. This couple of months was stressful. Not knowing what the new boss would be or if he gonna like me. Well, yes i had a recommendation from a reputable person but when it  comes to  Harry Styles you never know what he is up to. He was pretty good with me though. Kept his distance, professional but somehow friendly. His moods had his own mind. I never knew when he was angry or happy. God, was he even ever happy? Harry and Happy that are two different words that cannot and should not be put in one sentence but here i am putting them. 

Too much thinking  about boss Anna, wake up girl. Do not do that to yourself.  

Usually i have never had problems speaking with strangers, even with the intimidating once. I always knew what to say and when to say, somewhat was capable finding there soft spots and with little friendly or sexual flirt drag them into the dark places of dialogue. But it was useless, i mean, it was very, very hard with Styles. He had put a spell on me and shut me. A thick, brick and nasty wall was brought between us. I did not knew what was his problem but curiosity, Oh my God, curiosity killed the cat.

When i left the office it was over 9 p.m. and it was freezing outside. I snugged into my coat and drag my feet to the direction of my apartment. It was one of those cold winter days in New York informing us that the Winter had officially begun but i was so excited soon - New Year. Most favorite time of the year for me. I do not quite know when and why i fall in love with New Year but i felt really happy, loved and magically inspired. I adored buying gifts, setting up the Christmas Tree, decorating the house with all beautiful and festive decorations. I loved seeing peoples faces on the street. That was when they i believe felt the Christmas spirit. Do not get me wrong and do not judge me but i believe in a Santa Clause. I believe that he exists, that he has his bad and naughty kids list, that he someday would fly to my house and bring a gift though my chimney. From the very childhood i would leave a milk and a cookies for him to eat and just to rest.

Soon with the thought on Christmas i turned onto my street and got relieved when i saw my entrance. The work, walk and the winter just sucked all the strength out of me so i just needed a warm shower and my soft bed. I remember getting into my apartment but after it is blurry, i must fall a sleep.  

Cold, dark, scary. Some dots, scream, loud talks and  awful headache. All of this feeling was so so real i thought my head and heart would explode. I was a mess, sweaty and dirty. I woke up and i was speechless. I stood in the dirt, in some abandoned factory with the blood all over me. "What the fuck, where am i?" I had no clue. My eyes felt heavy, i was dizzy and could not able to move. I looked around and saw Harry. Wait what? Harry, Mr. Styles, Harry Styles. Oh, what i have done, what had happened here. 

I opened my eyes properly still very heavy and a dozen of people lying around, all dead. I tried, tried very hard to remember what had happened yesterday but failed, failed really bad. I stood up and went to check on Mr. Styles. Hoping that he was alright.

 I heard his heavy breath. 

Oh God, he is alive.

"Mr. Styles, Mr. Styles, Harry are you alright, please talk to me?" i bagged him, i cried for his response but he only continued to mumble some words that had no sense, well at least to me. 

"That bitch is still alive Jack, I told you we need to fucking kill her, look she is standing there with her pathetic boss".

"Calm down Brian, its easy to correct your mistake, you see, you raise your hand and click". The sound though, it was horrible, it echoed in that empty building and i fell, fell on my knees not quite understanding what just had happened with me. First,  i felt warmth in my body, than i thought i pissed myself and than i got chilled. I touched my chest it was bleeding, i was bleeding, fast, furious, non stop. I fainted, i knew it was an end, lovely and happy end. I was there lying next to the most amazing, breathtaking man i have ever met. I loved him but i was no longer with him.

I screamed and opened my eyes in disbelieve. Looked on my chest and cried. Damn it, i was crying my eyes off and did not even know why. I was so sweaty, hot and red and scared. What the hell was that? I was clearly a dream but felt  so real, i was frightened. Harry dead, me dead, that awful voices and the sound of the bullet still ring a bell in my ears. I looked at a clock, it was 5 a.m. I got up and went straight to the bathroom. I needed to wash myself. I needed to clean myself from that blood.

What the fuck??!!

Good evening/day sweeties. Thank you all who read my previous chapters. How are you? well what do you think? Please please it will mean a world to me if you could comment and tell me. It makes me so so motivated.

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