Six Letter Word [Kaylor]

September 2016 (Part 2)

Today was...wow. Not the good wow. Not at first, anyway. It was nothing like I expected. I thank God every day that He brought me Karlie. I don't know how I would have gotten through today without her. And I have no freaking clue how I could possibly get through everything that comes next if she wasn't here. She's so strong. It's horribly cliché and I HATE that. As a songwriter it rubs me the wrong way, but she really is my rock. Right now, I'm writing this on the couch, curled up against her chest while she messes around on her phone. Just having her here makes things better. She makes me feel safe even though I feel like I'm about to fly apart into millions of pieces. I wish I could stay here forever.

The morning started out boring. I made the coffee, while Karlie cut up fruit. She's scared of the Kurig, which is adorable, because she's not scared of anything. I diced tomatoes while she made egg white omelets, both with spinach and feta, hers with jalapenos, mine without, tomatoes added at the end, so they wouldn't get too squishy. The kind of ordinary morning you hope to have so often you take it for granted. You hope one day you stop noticing how graceful her hands are as she slices strawberries in half. That you stop getting lost in the way she tosses her head to get her blonde locks out of her face so she doesn't get cantaloupe juice in them. You pray a day comes that her laugh when a grape shoots out from under her knife and across the kitchen floor doesn't completely captivate you, because it's been so long, and you've loved it so much, it stops being remarkable.

We work well in parallel. Last time Lily came over she laughed because she thinks we're more married than her and Caleb. We share the master bath in the morning, Karlie showers first while I brush my teeth and figure out what I'm going to wear. Then she dries her hair and brushes her own teeth while I get in the shower. Sometimes, like today, she'll dry my hair for me. There's something so relaxing about having someone else do your hair, especially when it's someone you trust. I've always done my own hair, even for shows and stuff since I first started out. But with Karlie it's like this little thing she can do to let me have a few extra minutes to chill out in the morning, and I love that. In return, sometimes I'll do her makeup, just because it's fun, and she says I'm better than some of the artists from her shoots. I figure she's talking about, like, the one where they sprayed her with glitter that she was so allergic to she had to go to the hospital, or some of the really out there looks that no one would wear on the street, but I take it as a compliment anyway.

Mike came to the main floor to get us, where we'd paused to finish the last of our coffee before the appointment. The follow-up with Dr. Frye about my thyroid. Or antidepressants, depending on the results of the test. I'd managed to forget what was coming for a while. Karlie's good at that, distracting me. She knew I'd be freaking out, so she made sure we kept to our routine. Right up until we had to get in the car and drive over to the office. Sean drove, so Mike could escort us in. Last time, we were lucky. No one knew we were coming, or that I was there, and when we left, miraculously, no one caught us as we walked out. Going in, this time, I was one hundred percent terrified. There was no question we were going to be physically linked, I could only hope that no fan happened to be on the sidewalk to take photos.

They didn't even make me sign in, in the waiting room. They just escorted Karlie and I directly to Dr. Frye's office. The one with the desk again. She'd rearranged the furniture, so that now we could see the door when we sat in the chairs, waiting for her to come in. My breath caught in my throat when she entered the room, followed by another doctor. Dr. Frye never wears a white coat, but this lady did. It's weird, how time slows down. I had time to register that the new doctor was really pretty. My type, if you will. Blonde, athletic, light eyes. Older than us, somewhere in her thirties, but still fairly young. Still. I knew there aren't any good reasons for your doctor to bring in someone else.