I don't know. I feel trapped. There is absolutely no reason for it but I do and I hate it. I'm trapped in between everything I am everything I want to be and everything in between and it feels like I'm confined to the things I cant say and the silences and the looks and the laughs and the tears and the sheer nothingness of it all against the everything that life is and the things I don't know. Things I should know. I should know where I stand, and with who. I should know who is worth the fight and who is a fight. I should know what to do and what to be and what to say and what to feel and just what. But my heart is in a rib cage and my brain is in a skull and my existence is confined by the edges of my mind and I don't know where to go. Who to be. What to feel what to say who to love who to hate who to slightly dislike because of things that happened ages ago. Who am I? Am I the past? Am I the present? Or am I defined by my hopes and dreams and ambitions and the future that no one can be sure of? Am I a monster? Am I a saint? Am I a mediocre human with an average existence and a world of things unknown? I don't know. That bothers me. It all bothers me.
